Some Random Pics: Picrew, Cats, and More!

idk what to title my posts anymore—

Hi again. It's been yet another week. 

I feel dead or that I'm being killed, but I... that's just a sad excuse of a metaphor. 

College... ugh. So much work. So much stress. And I'm falling behind in most of my classes. 

Yeah haha, I'm totally thriving! /*sweats sarcasm*

idk what to say here anymore—

Ahem, ahem. Have some random pics, I guess.

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Link 1: https://picrew.me/image_maker/684058

It's supposed to be me with short hair and space makeup (the stars and moons look cute).

Jack looking cheerful. The lines under his eyes are the closest thing I could find to his small "x" tattoos on the lower outer corner next to his eyes. And yes, he is blushing. uwu

Fierdan... wait, he actually looks pretty normal? wow. Black and red suit him well. What do you think? Yeah uh, he's just there. 

Ryen is also just standing there. Sometimes I imagine him wearing an oversized white or beige coat. That blue-gray shirt also reminds me of him for some reason. The color does, I mean. He looks less annoyed in this Picrew. Good for him.

☾☾☾

(moon barrier- ha!)

Link 2: https://picrew.me/image_maker/140200

I designed Dylan and Jack here. Dylan is a bitter, short-tempered boy. He has no time for bs. Here, he's annoyed with Jack. That height difference though. It's more exaggerated in this Picrew, I'll admit. And look, the background is water. Heh, heh... nice.

☾☾☾

Link 3: https://picrew.me/image_maker/603740

First of all, this Picrew is adorable! I love it. I designed myself wearing a cat hat and a clown outfit while holding a frog toy and thinking of frogs. cats + frogs + clowns = what's on my mind. hehe :3

☾☾☾

Link 4: https://picrew.me/image_maker/598865

I also really like the style of this Picrew. It's cute and funny. I like the clueless and lost vibes in some of the Picrews. It kinda reminds me of the meme where the anime boy doesn't know what a butterfly is. The blank look in the eyes staring at nothing, the smile, the hand position. Haha yes. Where am I? Well, I guess I'm in the sky. There are both clouds and glowing stars. Hmm, that's interesting. 

☾☾☾

That's enough with Picrew for now. 

So now it's cat time! ;D

Ok so last Monday, I found this cats spot on my college campus. And me, being a cat lover, was thrilled to see all the cats. They're small cats and some are tuxedo cats, so they remind me of Thelma (my tuxedo cat). 

Seeing cats gives me serotonin that I desperately need. Haha... oof.

Here are some of the cat pics I took over the past week. I visited the cats spot a few times. :3

Look at them relaxing in the sun. The weather has been warm and sunny lately. Not now though. It's currently windy and raining. 

There's a gazebo with a few benches as well as a small pond and little stream in this place. It's so peaceful. It's such a nice spot. Then add cats and it's even better. I love it.

These tuxedo cats were relaxing on the bench opposite of where I was sitting. They remind me of my Thelma. They're so cute. :')

<3 <3

☾☾☾

Now it's time for the ??? Miscellaneous part of the post. >;)

With pictures of course. Will there be context? Eh, who knows? 

Ok, let's get on with it. 

☾☾☾

Screenshots from a story on Episode called "The Darkness Within" which I played in November. 

I kept forgetting to put them in a post, so I'm doing that now. Sure.

Danielle = female Fierdan (Daniel). 

These screenshots remind me of when Fierdan (going by Danny at the time) starts to become vulnerable with Jack and confides in him. The start of their close friendship which eventually becomes their romantic and sexual relationship as well later on. But they stay as good friends for a long while before all that. 

Fierdan has lots of nightmares and flashbacks as a result of his PTSD (his own trauma and Duke's). So he doesn't like sleeping alone. 

So then Jack lets Fierdan hang out at night in his room. And that's what they do: hang out. Sometimes they watch movies. It's pretty cute. Then Fierdan starts staying the night there, so he won't sleep alone. He has someone by his side. It supposedly helps with his nightmares and abandonment issues. *shrugs*

By the way, "Jack" is another one of his "J" nicknames. He really likes using Jack because of its connotations (jack of all trades, the jack cards in a deck of cards). He's kind of like a Joker. A fool, a jester... and he has the ability to be evil like the Joker villain. Hehe, he has a dark side. 

ja boi !!

The screenshots:

My heart... ;~;

Don't mind me imagining ja boi with purple contacts and purple hair. I can totally picture him appearing like that at some point. 

Jack is also very twisted. Fierdan isn't the only one who's twisted and sinister. Jack also did some pretty screwed up stuff. He ain't a saint.

~ all the hair dye, tattoos, and piercings to separate himself from his past. moving on from his old self. ja boi, you're having an identity crisis. i know you are. ~

What else..?

I miss writing skits. I haven't made one in ages. 

I don't know where to begin. How to start again.

I miss seeing my characters interact with each other. They all seem stagnant without any new skits. What are they up to? I don't know.

To me, they're alive. They live in my mind. They have their own thoughts and lives. 

Hahahahahaha fuu—

I still add songs to their Spotify playlists. Because... music... yes. Music, my beloved. (the meme- yes).

Ok, I'm too tired to continue this post. I'll end it here.

Bye, bye. 

~ Shan / Cutepups 

hi i'm ______ + no context nonsense

Hi, I'll be including pictures in this post. Nice.

I ended up going off-topic in the last post. Whoops. I guess you could say I got carried away.

Story 1 is so messed up. Geez.

My lovely, cursed characters! ;D

Anyway, I'm going to try and create my music playlists for Sparkle and C./Calliah soon. My lists of songs for them is starting to get long.

The one for C./Calliah shares songs from most of my other playlists (*cough* Duke/Fierdan, Ryen, Dawn) which makes sense. Since C. is their mother and Calliah is Duke's.

Meanwhile, I think Sparkle's is entirely different. XD

Now on with the main point of this post (before the silliness)!*

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*breathes in*
*breathes out*
o k a y

I just want to talk about (clarify?) some things regarding myself. As always, I'm writing this post in a "stream of consciousness" way. Will things go deep? Perhaps.

Well, here goes.

Hi, I go by a few names; the ones I go by most often online these days are: Shan, Spirit, and in respects to the origins of this blog, Cutepups.

Shan is most like my birth name, which I've mentioned here before. So, uh, well.......

At first, I wasn't taking Shan that seriously as a name. I just regarded it as my birth name minus a few letters. And yeah, that is true. But ok. Here's the thing.

I've grown attached to calling myself Shan. I like how it sounds. It makes me feel good in my own skin, so to speak. No, I don't hate my birth name; it's just that I like hearing Shan. Thinking people are calling me Shan (maybe I'm not hearing them properly lol), calling myself Shan... it just feels good.

On another note... wanna see my ring? Well, one of them. Haha.

Here it is!

(ignore my hand lol just focus on the ring)

Here's one of the rings I got for Hanukkah! :D

If you didn't know, I was so so happy to get this ring. Why, you ask? Well, you see......

It's supposed to be my aromantic ring. If you don't know what aromantic means, you can look it up yourself. 

But I'll briefly explain what an "aro ring" is. 

Aro rings are white or silver, and they can be any type of ring. The rings are worn on the middle finger of the left hand. That's why I'm wearing my ring on that finger.

My ring is silver and is in the shape of an arrow. One of the symbols of aromanticism in the aromantic community is arrows. 

And so, I call it my "arrow aro ring". :)

This past week was also Aromantic (Spectrum) Awareness Week. I know I'm late to the party, but here I am! 

Moving on now......~

I'm taking a few literature courses at university, so I have to read a lot. Maybe I'll make a post (or few) where I'll just ramble/rant about the books I had to read. I'm not in the mood to do that now.

This past evening was so good. I felt genuinely happy. I was in a good mood. And I still am... except I'm a lot more tired now, haha.

I had to go to an event where I had to dress up. Not fancy-fancy; more formal dress than a T-shirt and jeans. So I found a nice white top, and I liked wearing it. I also had my contacts in and found it easier to put on makeup than before. I rarely wear makeup, but I felt like putting on a little makeup for the event. 

So I did that. There, I socialized with friends. Which was pretty entertaining. Some of them are wild. Oh geez. XD

Then later on, I was in a video call with my sister and parents. So... yeah lol. 

I don't want to make this post drag on and on, so I'll now conclude the serious part of it.

Hi, I'm... happy. 

:) 

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Time for nonsense! Silliness! Time to go berserk! Let chaos unfold! 

........ and by that, I mean that I'll be inserting pictures from Episode stories I've played/read without explaining what's going on. 

Oh boy, this will be fun! >:D

*brings out the pics*

~*~*~*~*~*~

1st Episode story (male version, then female version): "Bad to the Bone" by Lee Funk. (aka God Killer! Fierdan AU story)

lmao 

and the female version:

Danielle = female! Fierdan

(Danielle ... Daniel — yeah.)

-x-x-x-

2nd Episode story: "Wings of Light" by How_Novel. (aka possible Dukle (DukeXTwinkle) story?)

This story uses ink; the others use something called limelight. 

Stella = Twinkle

Anyone remember that ship from back in the day? Dukle? Duke and Twinkle shipped together? That ship I made canon? Yeah boi. What a classic. Bi/Ace solidarity! *claps*

Uh, what? They are. Yes.

-x-x-x-

3rd Episode story: "My Alien Lover" by Anyanka. (This one isn't connected to my characters, but I made the male main character kind of look like Fierdan but off-color Yes, I gave Fierdan an unofficial Episode look. Hopefully, you'll understand by the end of this post what that look is. *winks at my computer screen*)

their faces lmao 

-x-x-x-

4th Episode story: "Counting Sheep" by Piccalily. (aka casual school AU for Duke/Fierdan. The main male character I play as is both Duke and Fierdan because I said so. oh and it is also gay. of course.)

The Fierdan-looking character is Danny. Because that sounds like a more ordinary name. Because... school AU. 

That look in the second picture. Omg. Danny's face. That knowing look. Boi, you gay. Well, you're bi. But hey, you're a boy who likes boys. Which is pretty gay if you ask me. lol

The blond boy who is Cameron is supposed to kinda be like my Finny character but if he possibly has a romantic crush on Duke. I mean Danny. lol that's gay

Cameron (aka Finny): *sighs* This really doesn't count as our first date, does it? 

Hmm. Is he hesitant, afraid to verify the friendship turning into romance as well? Or is he sighing because he's disappointed. Like idk, "*sigh* first date? I just wanted to hang out with my dude, Danny; I hope I didn't give him the wrong idea like I'm gay or something." lol

Episode is a wonderful app! XD

Well, I'm going to end this post here. 

Time for me to go to sleep. Good night.

God Killer Fierdan! Episode Story AU (2)

Hi everyone, I'm finally back with part 2 of Cutepups-rambling-about-an-Episode-story! How fun! And there will be pictures this time! Yay! ;D

First of all, here are some links:

what app am i referring to? it's this one.

The Episode story is called "H & V: Bad to the Bone" by Lee Funk (@/LeeFunkTheAuthor).

The story isn't mine, obviously. However, I found some similarities between the main character in this story and how Fierdan in my own story behaves. And of course, I named the main character of this story, Fierdan.

here is part 1 in case anyone has to catch up or wants to read some context. or any other reason.

Alright. Those are the links. Now let's get on with it!

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Fierdan: I want you dead and stop acting like this temporarily alliance is anything more. 

This Episode outfit is the one that looks like what Fierdan wears in my story canon. I like how it looks on him. Black and purple clothing. A cape. Those kinds of clothes. He doesn't have piercings when he mainly dresses like this in my story (when he's in Cincernum... minus the black goop, isolation, and being cursed... *coughs*) though. I think he looks nice with piercings, haha. 

And this scene is similar to how my Fierdan is regarding a special someone. ;) (you know who) ... it's Soulless. 

Oh wait. Let's back it up a little, shall we? 

Fierdan: Y-you aren't dying Zion. I don't want you to die. 

This is from an earlier chapter than the previous picture. I made Fierdan wear the same outfit, even though this chapter takes place in a snowy land. This is God!Fierdan so he can dress up however he pleases. He is a god who gives no fucks. :)

The red hand on the tree if supposed to be blood. Haha yeah. This is one of those violent Episode stories. 

Like I said before, the main point of this story is for the main character (Fierdan) to kill his fellow gods and goddesses. Fierdan, who is also a god, wants to kill the rest of them. Or at least he wants them all dead. He doesn't get to kill them all. 

So yeah. Fierdan is a god killer. Ah, my fiery disaster man! Always having to kill, huh? Yep, that's my man!

 Zion is the first person Fierdan finds and puts on his team. At first, Fierdan had no feelings except "gotta murder the gods!"...  and Zion was an annoying but vital part of Fierdan's team. But then as the story progresses, Fierdan gains feelings (except confusing justice with violence) and grows attached to Zion. Hence, the picture of them above.

By the way, I think it's ironic how the tall guy is named Zion. Since, well, it starts with a Z. And we all know which character in my story has a name that starts with Z— Fierdan's father. And I originally named his father, Zios. Oh hmm... 

But Zion is a good guy. He can be quite a nuisance and makes some stupid decisions, yet he is still appreciated. Heck, even Fierdan appreciates him. 

Z though? Not at all. Z is hated through and through. 

Onto more pictures and rambling now! 

Fierdan: Consider our bromance over. 

It's the boys again! Their relationship is so beautiful. Fierdan admits that their relationship is a bromance. Oh no, it ended! Damn. That's tragic. </3

I know this an Episode story, but I perceive the characters' emotions and body language so strongly. Like, this right here? Such a classic. I love them.

...... and honestly, these characters kinda remind me of Duke and Brock in my skits. *wink, wink* ... oh, come on. we all know they had something going on. Duke and Brock. Umm? Yes! XD

Moving along now........

Fierdan: You don't want to be like me. 

Yeah, that's Fierdan's entire character in a nutshell. It goes beyond a single story universe. Wow, that runs deep! 

The girl he's talking with is a demigod named Carys, if I'm remembering correctly. She and the demigods join Fierdan's team of fighting and killing the gods and goddesses. 

Also, this outfit? What a look. Fierdan slays all his outfits. Slay! (oh heck, he has knives. get it? slay? hahaha. yeah.)

Fierdan: I can't cry. I can't form emotional bonds and I certainly can't feel love for someone.

Now Fierdan is talking about how he's emotionless and can't feel love. Hmm... mood? This scene makes me wonder if the main character in the story is possibly aromantic..? 

He means all types of love. But like. This scene! *screams*

Fierdan... ;-; hhhhhfffgh. 

Anyway. Let's continue. 

Fierdan: Oh boo-hoo. 

Every time I look at this picture, I think it's so fucking funny. Fierdan, damn, he's so iconic. What a legend. 

"Oh boo-hoo." That dialogue. Damn, this Episode Fierdan is a savage. I love him!

He got knocked to the ground, and yet he looks so chill. For someone whose main goal in life is to kill his kind (the gods), he sure looks calm and collected. He's just there. On the ground. Looking like that. Damn son.

The woman is Irene, the goddess of peace and justice. Well, if I remember correctly. It's very ironic that she's the goddess of peace. Because like... Irene, she's an interesting one.

She likes fighting, and of course fighting Fierdan. She has a grudge against him. I mean, who wouldn't? But she's Irene. 

She wanted to kill her husband, then she wanted him to suffer, and she also wanted to create an army to fight the demigods. Sounds peaceful, huh! Yeah, no. 

Now let's get to the good stuff! >:D

Fierdan... wait no, it says Ash Beast. Ash Beast, possessing Fierdan's body: I will win. What do you want anyway? 

Evil, evil, evil. This character is evil. 

Ash Beast can control Fierdan's body and do things that Fierdan opposes. Does that remind you of my story at all? 

Oh yes. Soulless! That demonic bastard. Can't forget that demon. 

When the Ash Beast takes over Episode Fierdan's body, he becomes more powerful. Oh and by the way, Ash Beast apparently created the gods. So there's that to keep in mind. 

In my story, well... When Soulless manipulates Fierdan and controls his body, Fierdan becomes stronger than he is without Soulless possessing him. And Fierdan, under the influence of Soulless, gives off more inhumane and evil vibes than he is on his own. 

And hey, look at these pictures. *winks* 

Ash Beast: Then I am going to take it by force. 

This is what the Ash Beast looks like... outside of Fierdan's body. Hmm. I think Fierdan is hotter though. :/

Ok but Fierdan looks like a tall child in comparison. Why is he smiling? I don't get it. Episode is strange. :/

Anyway, Ash Beast dude wants to take full control of Fierdan's body. I think that is what they are arguing about.

It kinda reminds me of Fierdan and Soulless spending time in Cincernum. They argue a lot. I mean, hey, that's understandable. Soulless wants to take full control of Fierdan's body and Duke's as well. Soulless also wants to possess Fierdan's body permanently "by force" so... yeah. I see similarities here.

The similarities between Episode Fierdan and Ash Beast & my story Fierdan and Soulless are strong here. Damn.

Fierdan: My actions... are rarely my own lately.

Oh no, the boy is sad! The god killer is sad! :'(

He doesn't have full control over his actions. Ash Beast is making his body do things he doesn't want to. 

*thinks of Fierdan and Soulless, and sweats* h-heck,,

Fierdan: I believe he's trying to make himself seem less like the enemy, but he's the one who wants to take over my body.

Oh fuck. This made me so emotional. I screamed when I first read/played this chapter. The similarities between my Fierdan and this Fierdan have me screaming. What the hell is this?! Ahh!

Fun Fact: At first, I thought Fierdan was naked or wearing underwear in this scene. He's not. He has pants on. Don't worry.

However, in the next few chapters Fierdan has scenes when he's walking around in his underwear. So, well, there's that.

The smoke effect gives me even more Soulless vibes. God... damn it.

Now let me bring that picture back. And add context. 

Since Fierdan is wearing a different outfit, this takes place in a later chapter. Fierdan,, yes boy,, call that bastard out! Yes!!

This Fierdan wants the Ash Beast dead. He wishes Ash Beast would die. He's so over the "temporarily alliance" they supposedly have.

Well... huh. That sure reminds me of my Fierdan and Soulless. 

Fierdan wants Soulless dead. He wants Soulless to go away for good. Forever. They also had something like an alliance. I mean, Soulless helped Fierdan survive when he was initially dropped in Z's project world. Soulless was kind of like Fierdan's (and Dawn's too, to some extent) mentor. Soulless was like a twisted up teacher. And of course, Fierdan and Soulless had to have some type of alliance, otherwise the DUKE Fierdan (Duke) wouldn't be created and born. 

So yeah. Hmm. 

I'll make a part 3 of this at some point. 

God Killer Fierdan! Episode Story AU (1)

Hi, I'm back. I should make several posts today because I go back to college tomorrow. College.. eww.

Anyway, remember how I was talking about an Episode story? Well, I'm going to start talking about it now.

I tried to make the titles of these posts as simple as possible. I did not create this story. I don't know how to make stories on the app.

*cough* Cutepups is an untalented loser. :( *cough*

What's Episode, you ask? It's this interactive story app. You might have heard of it from the weird ads it has on social media. Is that still a thing? I don't know.

Anyway, here's a link to the website. I can't link to the specific story I'll be rambling on about. That's tragic. Oh well, deal with it. Take my word. This story is real and valid.

......... uh, what—

The link: https://www.episodeinteractive.com

Oh good, now that we have that out of the way...

Onto the Episode story! :D ;)

Oh yeah. AU stands for Alternate Universe. Because.. well, I don't have to explain it, do I?

I made the main character I play as be named Fierdan. I made the character look like Fierdan. I tried my best. It's not in my own story universe; therefore, it is in another.

This story lets you create a male or female main character. I also made a female Fierdan version, but I'll only discuss the regular Episode Fierdan for now.

Oh shoot, that's right. The title of the story is "H & V: Bad to the Bone" by Lee Funk (@/LeeFunkTheAuthor). So yeah, credits to that person. Good story.

I'm also happy because creating a Fierdan Episode character kinda helped me visualize his appearance. Well, after he cut his messy, long Cincernum hair at least.

Creating a Fierdan character in an Episode story worked surprisingly well. I did not expect it to work as well as it did.

Since this is starting to look boring with all this text, I'll include the first screenshot I made of the story with no explanation. You're welcome. :)

Fierdan: *in deep thought, is wearing glasses (which he doesn't wear in canon until several years later) and cat ears because his taste in fashion is god-like (lmao)* Kids? A relationship? Adopting twelve cats? Adopting twelve dogs?

Here, Fierdan is questioning what he is going to do with his life. Future goals, who? He is at a total loss. Wow, that's relatable. 

I guess I should explain some stuff. Yeah, I'll do that.

The main character (Fierdan) is a god. He is like an edgy rebel teenage son.. except he's in his 20's. He is the child of two gods (a fire goddess and a weapon god? lol that's wack), and that's supposed to be something rare. Fierdan also has a sister (Dawn).. except she's greedy for the throne. Both siblings are evil because of course Fierdan is evil. That's how he is.

Well, Fierdan isn't all that evil. He kills and injures a lot of characters though. So yeah, he's still a killer. Uh, read the title. Fierdan is a god killer. His main goal in life (which he planned for in his room for 15 years, apparently) is to kill the gods. Yes, the gods are his family. Does he care? Of course not. Fierdan is a killer. That's been canon ever since his existence. Seriously.

Like the majority of the gods, Fierdan lived in the gods world.. until recently. He falls down to the world (which isn't Earth) and immediately goes searching for his human crew of misfits. I did not design the other characters; I only designed Fierdan and Dawn. If I didn't change their designs, my Fierdan character would look nothing like my Fierdan. That would not make sense.

I don't recall Fierdan ever meeting a cat or dog in the story, but he wants twelve of them each. That makes perfect sense! He's so relatable! XD

Adopt your 12 cats and 12 dogs, my man! Live your dreams! :U

And yes, Fierdan does have a reason he wants him (and his crew) to kill the gods. They're like evil, dude. Actually, it's because the gods are helping Soulless to destroy not-Earth human world.

Oh, did I say Soulless? I meant to say Ash Beast. The character is called Ash Beast, not Soulless. My mistake.

By the way, Fierdan bonds with his human team. At first, a lot of other characters (humans and gods alike) call Fierdan a "psycho" or "psychopath" which is pretty damn similar to what other characters call Fierdan before they really get to know him. But Fierdan eventually makes friends. I'm proud of my fiery disaster boy!

Zion is one of these humans. Fierdan and Zion have quite a relationship. They've been through a lot.

*cough, cough, cough*

Oh no, I have to go now! Expect more pictures in the next post!