Twinkle's Story: Chapter 9

*WARNING: This chapter contains some violence.*
Here's Chapter 9. Hope you enjoy! :)

DUKE

I am on the Tall Tower's roof now. I told Twinkle the devastating news about my father. That he is now dead- thanks to my own mother. I just finished telling Twinkle, which took around half an hour to finish. It being hard for me to tell to someone else, and Twinkle asking what seemed like countless questions- even though it was just a few, really. My paws still shake and tremble from that conversation on the phone. My worst fear is now in reality; it's alive. Actually, I'm not sure why I'm so horrified of it. A sword, red, dripping blood. Maybe because it's my father's blood.

 He always wanted to help me out, to protect me, to risk his life to save mine. However, I'm not scared of blood. That's another reason I'm unlike other foxes. I try my best to act and behave like just another fox. Twinkle thought so anyways. In fact, everybody who didn't know the dark hidden secrets of my family, believed so. I like to think of myself as the master of disguise; of keeping 'the darkness' hidden. The truth about my life, especially in the past, is what I like to call 'the darkness'. Because my life is basically the definition of 'darkness' and I keep, kept, it hidden. For a long time anyways.

"... You have a life tougher than mine. How stupid of me to think that my life is worse, when yours is clearly worse than mine! That's really tough news then. Really, really tough." Twinkle finally pauses after babbling on whatever she's talking about for a few minutes. I perk one of my ears up. A sign that's like: I'm listening, but what in the world are you talking about? That kind of sign. She sighs and is about to continue talking. I don't distract myself, so I know what she's saying. So I don't become lost again. Twinkle is about to continue talking, but she finally notices why and who she's talking to again. She sighs again, but this time she looks straight at me- in the eye. "Duke, why are you obsessing over me? You've obviously had it worse than me. My life is easy compared to yours. Duke, you've lost everyone and everything. Except your mother. She's not really yours. Y'know? Somebody who you're glad to have in your life- family. But your dad! He protected you so much, and now he's dead- murdered by his own wife. This is making me so emotional..." Twinkle wipes her cheek, probably wiping away imaginary tears or something. We look each other in the eye again. I have a faint smile. She can make a topic that's very hurtful and depressing, sound a little funny. I say, "Ah, maybe the awfulness of our lives is balanced out now. Maybe we're equal now. Like seriously, having a psychotic mother who probably works for the Phantom Government, and being locked up at home all day, everyday with blue fur seems pretty disappointingly equal to me. I also know we're equal now since you've lost your sister, and for me, my dad. And I haven't lost everyone. Well, not yet anyways. Ah, never mind. Scratch that. I haven't lost everything- I haven't lost you, anyways." Twinkle has a tiny smile; I laugh. Twinkle takes a step back, moving closer to the Tall Tower's barrier. I take a step closer to her and try to wrap my front paw (the one without the wound caused by a tiara) around her, but she takes another step away before I can do so.

 I give up and sigh. I look in Twinkle's eyes again. I see fear in them. Is she really that scared of the news I told her? It doesn't even concern her, only me. Then I realize it's just me and her reversed. I worried about her when she passed out at Zios' gravesite, like she's worrying about me now. Or maybe that isn't really the reason. Maybe Twinkle's feared of us loving each other. Feared of what? I focus myself back to the present. Twinkle still has a look of fear in her eyes.

This time, her look of fear reminds me of my own fears. Caused by my mother for most of them; some caused just by myself. There's more than one for each year of my life, but I like to think of the worst ones of each year the most. One for each of the 14 years of my life. In year:
1. The first time I heard arguments, as well as tons and tons of yelling.
2. The first time I heard a shot of an arrow. No, it wasn't by my mother.
3. The first time my mother nearly killed me. She was picking me up from Pre-K Kit School. Let's just say she was in no condition whatsoever for picking somebody up- especially a toddler.
4. My mother decides to give me haircuts by herself. Cutting the hair on my head way shorter than other foxes. However, I liked the look of it. (Nothing really bad and fearful happened when I was 4).

5. Mother turns on me. Starts to yell and argue with me too. Just like she did with my dad at age 1.
6. The first time I tried to cut my hair by myself. I almost did it perfectly- not quite. I was trimming the edges to make sure it was perfect (like the way my mom used to do it for me) with a razor blade. Then for a second, my paw holding the razor slips, and I forget I'm still holding the razor- the blade end pointed at me. The razor blade left a scratch with blood (even today) on the back of my neck, right where the bottom of my head's hairline ends.

 However, it's unnoticeable because I don't cut that hair there as short (just slightly) than the others. Hidden.
7. My mother starts calling me names for a reason I can't quite identify- even to this day. Let's just say those names aren't nice to say.
8. My mother orders me by force to lift heavy objects. At first, she told me it would make me healthy, strong, a good boy. Later on as the objects became more extreme, I realized she just liked to watch me suffer. No, she didn't help me at all, or even encourage me. She would scold me, which made me feel bad, if I refused to do it. Then, to slapping me if I refused. That hurt a lot, so I never refused again. As I felt like I couldn't breathe lifting the object, she would just sit on the chair or couch in front of me, looking at me or reading a magazine of some sort.
9. Being locked in the basement all day for asking my mother why she argues with my dad so often. In the winter. The house's basement has a very low ceiling, is very dark, infested with pests, and has no air circulation- no AC or heat. I like being on top of things, not below. I was trapped in the basement for 12 hours that winter day. From 9 in the morning to 9 at night. Freezing in a very small basement in complete darkness, occasionally hearing the scurrying footsteps of a pest. To me, that is pretty terrifying. Oh did I say I'm also claustrophobic? That so helps in this situation- not.
10. The first time I see a phantom. It was on the fox territory border, sniffing (or what looked like it), then creeping back into the shadows again. Wow, phantoms are hideous to look at in person! Obviously by now I'm more used to knowing what phantoms look like.

11. My friend, a daredevil, (at my old school- near the house where my parents and I lived together) one day tells me to meet up somewhere. He says we're going to do a stunt when we're both there. It's at one of the city's telephone wires. As we're on top of one of the poles leading up to the wires, I say "no" because I have some sense. He rolled his eyes at me and did the stunt. Riding a bike along one of the wires. Then one of the bike's wheels got stuck (it wouldn't move), and he lost his balance. He slipped along with his bike off the wire and fell to the street far below. His back paws twisted and bent at awkward angles. Later on, I heard that he got half paralyzed. He never came to school (or anywhere else) ever again. I don't even remember his name now.

12. After so many fights and complaints, my father files a lawsuit then later divorces my mother. My mother got so mad. Father divorced Mother- and I know why. We both know that she lately hasn't been giving us any attention lately (except to yell at us) because she began to cross the border and go into the forest more to visit the arctic wolf leader. So she basically cheated on my father. Mother even proudly announced that she never loved Father, that I'm a mistake, and that she really only loves that arctic wolf leader. After the divorce, Father sent me to our cousins' house. A few months later, he finally explained to me why he did it.
13. The major fox and arctic wolf battle occurred. The arctic wolves wanted to steal some of our territory, which was rightfully ours. This was the last straw for us foxes, of the arctic wolves mistreating us foxes. We were all required to fight at the battle for our land, for what's right. Which resulted in phantoms coming, and Twinkle's younger sister, Fauna, being shot and killed. I have no idea how Mother can deal with arctic wolves, never mind being in love with one!
14. Discovering that my own mother would abuse her son with much more brutal violence than ever before. Finding out my mother is now a murderer of her former husband (my father). The first time I'm in love with somebody. Twinkle.

TWINKLE

I don't know why, but the news Duke told me just minutes ago, has made me feel something I didn't know could exist. That I could feel his pain and sufferings and somewhat understand them. Is this how Duke felt when I was unconscious at Zios' gravesite? How about when I first arrived at the hospital? I finally get it. It's because we care so much for each other, that we worry about each other. We even understand each other. We (Duke and I) are clearly meant to be. Knowing that no one has a perfect life, that everyone gets pain at some point in their life, everyone gets 'trapped' at some point in their life, makes me feel stronger. More confident that I'm not alone in this world... it's hard to explain. It also makes me love Duke even more. Knowing he's brave, strong, and all... But why did I flinch and back away when he tried to touch me? Even I can't find a logical reason for it. The best reason I have is: Are we both scared of each other? But even that doesn't seem to have enough sense to satisfy me. I look up at the sky. "Wow," I breathe. "It's beautiful." I feel a paw on one of my shoulders, and I turn around to see Duke there. I turn back towards the sky. Even though he just admitted miserable news to me, he smiles. He pats my shoulder and says, "Yes. Yes it is. And so are you." I look over my shoulder at him and blush.

 Again, I turn around. The sky isn't even blue. It's a peach-like color with streaks of pink dashed across. Like from the stroke of a paintbrush. It reminds me of one of the first ancient leaders of our town, Jamaa. They were called the Alphas. The sky reminds me of Peck the bunny Alpha.  Unlike today's leaders, they cared for everyone, no matter what species you are. Today, we have different leaders for each animal species. I missed the days back then, and I wish I could live in a world like that. That must have been so peaceful too! I sit down putting my feet in the cracks in the roof's barrier edge, and I swing them back and forth.

 Then, an idea that seems like a miracle pops into my head. It would bring peace to us all again- or so I think. I want to keep it in my head for a little while before I go right out and tell Duke. I might be considered a hero! But a nagging feeling is in the back of my head. What would Duke's reaction be? I get up again and rush towards Duke from behind. I laugh at his confused expression, since I wanted to avoid him a few minutes ago. I whisper in his ear closest to me. "No, Duke. You're wrong. I'm not the only one who 'can take on anything'. You know why? Because you can too. We can take on anything. Alone or together." I give him another hug. He turns his head around to look at me. His eyes still are feared from what happened earlier, but I see a smile across his face. I smile back loving every second of this.