Well uh. Hi guys. I’m back. Sorry for being so inactive lately!
I’ve been very tired all day. Well, from last night to a few hours ago. I slept a lot today.
In the most recent dream I had, I was thinking of a man called Dani Soot. Yep, spelled like that. I don’t know why he’s called that. The dream was weird and somewhat frightening. I’ve been having bad dreams again lately. Anyway, I only know that Dani Soot is tall and has long blond hair.
That’s all I’ve got. XD
........ just kidding. 🤪 -insert silly face emoji here-
Well. Life happened. On December 28th, my mood fell real low. My genuine happiness streak ended. Which hurt. A lot.
I felt emotionally hurt and was in physical pain.
For the past few days, I couldn’t really breathe through my nose. Even though I was taking medicine on top of doing other things that supposedly work to make my nose hurt less, none of the things worked. It hurt a lot.
Now skip to a few hours ago, and I feel like I can finally breathe again. My head was starting to hurt a lot too.
December 28th was a busy morning for me. First, I went with my family to a restaurant for breakfast. Food,, so good,, yum. Then I had my eye exam. Which was.. not so great.
I found out my eyesight got a lot worse. I know my eyes not working right doesn’t define me as a person, but I felt so awkward and embarrassed for not being able to read all the letters. And I don’t just mean the teeny tiny last row of letters either. There were lots of lines of letters I had to read.
I was also planning on getting contacts. But that didn’t work so well either. I had trouble opening my eyes wide enough or whatever, I got shamed for being hesitant on touching my eyeballs, I tried so many times to get it right that my eyes and myself started getting irritable and they hurt.. and yeah, it was a disaster.
Me and my poor eyesight. :(
Tomorrow is New Year’s Eve. It’s almost 2020. Yikes. 2 days. Big yikes. O_O
What a decade. Things sure did happen. That was weird.
Hi everyone. Today was my last day of my poetry class. Here I'll be showing my latest version of the instructional prose poem I wrote for the class.
*Note: It's supposed to be written like an instruction manual. It is supposed to be instructions on something we shouldn't need instructions for. The subject is on any innate human ability. Satire is also included in this type of prose poem.
Enjoy! ;)
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Instructions On How To Smile
First, remember that you are alive. Think of something, anything, that motivates you to keep on living. When you have thought of something, write it down on a piece of paper. Get some tape and stick it onto your bathroom mirror. Reread what you wrote.
Look at yourself. Watch your reflection staring back at you. Don’t disappoint the person on the other side of the glass. That is not recommended. In order to smile, stretch your lips horizontally. Do not stretch vertically. Imagine that what you wrote down is happening right now. Feel it through all your senses. Live it to the best of your ability.
If you are unable to feel joy, fake it till you make it. Despite popular belief, brains aren’t that smart. Using your facial muscles in an attempt to form a smile will trick your brain into feeling better. If you’re still having trouble, have a sense of humor. Remember that life is a joke. Laugh, then smile. Your cheeks and mouth may begin to hurt. Relax your muscles, and most importantly, be kind to yourself.
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And that's my prose poem with instructions on how to smile. :)
Hi, so on Friday my family bought a cat hotel/condo thing for our cats.
Thelma likes it so far. She can jump from the floor to the top hole in it. She’s so playful; I love her.
And I put Zo in it. I think my brother put him in it too.
The cat hotel was put in the same room as the new flooring and couches.
Now it’s time for pictures. :)
Thelma :3
Zo >:3
They’re so cute. I love these silly kitties. <3
Thelma enjoys playing with it and sleeping in it, but Zo is wary of it. He doesn’t like new things. Thelma, however, likes new things. She likes to explore the new couches. XD
And now I’m back at college. No more new pictures of my pets. Oh darn. :(
Apparently, there’s a chance it’s going to snow here on Sunday, so I went back today. My sister planned on going back on Saturday anyway, so she dropped me off.
I thought I would make more posts earlier. But then I got distracted with Life. And and and........... idk.
Well. I had a long essay due on Monday. Started working on a project on Tuesday. Went home for Thanksgiving break on Wednesday. Thanksgiving was Thursday.
And now it’s Friday. Black Friday. ...... yeet!
I’m home now. I got to see my pets again. Very good. Uh......... :3
There’s new couches and flooring in the family room. It looks very nice. I like it.
I had disturbing dreams that frightened me and made me feel weird. I know I did. But I can’t remember what happened in them now.
I’m typing this so fast. Wow.
I feel weird. My body feels weird.
[cw: depression, suicidal/suicide]
.........,,,,,,,,,,,.........,,,... I hate how my sister is starting to give off that Vibe that she Knows Better and knows Everything about how to Help people with some disabilities (something something they need occupational therapy for) and Mental Illnesses. I don’t know how to put my feelings into words. So uh..... great :}! And how my family was all in shock like “whAT?!?!” or “haha that’s a red flag, what a freak. hahaha” when something something topic about someone reaching out to my sister and something about about reaching out for help and person is suicidal. Like ~ghost noises~ “someone is suicidal! what’s that?? scary!! I feel nauseous now!” was how my family reacted to hearing my sister’s story. Like. Really. Hearing that someone is suicidal made some of my family. Nauseous. What the hell. What. The. Hell. I’m. I really don’t know. And I’m like. Right there. At least my sister didn’t tell the suicidal person “Think positive!” or “Just be happy!” or any of that bs. But idk guys. She really gave off that Vibe that she knows more about Depression than the rest of the family. And how to deal with someone who’s suicidal and knows more about what it’s like to be suicidal. Than the rest of the family. Than me. Me! I’m right there. And she thinks I know nothing. I’m stupid and oblivious. Mental health who?? I’ve never heard of That, apparently!! I’m just. I can’t. She lowkey reminds me of psych majors who think they know better than people who are mentally ill. Like. Really?! Newsflash: I have depression. I’ve had symptoms of depression for a long time now, and I know more about it than someone learning about it in a classroom a few months (if even for that long) ago. I know what it’s like to feel suicidal. I’ve been suicidal every single day for months. At a time. Stop thinking being suicidal is so taboo. I’m right there. If I wasn’t so tired and deep into a depressive episode this past summer, there was a high chance I would’ve (poorly lol) attempted suicide. I’ve been at my breaking point so many damn times already. I’m depressed. So stop thinking and talking about that stuff like it’s so taboo and no one in the family could’ve possibly ever been suicidal. The only reason I probably didn’t attempt so far was because I started going to therapy and I take medication now. That’s probably it. Because I thought about killing myself most days this summer. I’m sorry. But like. If I actually did go attempting, would my family still think of suicide and being suicidal the same way they did yesterday? I really don’t know. I don’t want to know. Stop thinking you know more about my own mental health than I do! Stop making a joke about people who are suicidal! Stop assuming no one in the immediate family knows what being suicidal is like! Stop believing I can’t ever have bad days or else I’m giving in to my depression! Stop it!!
...... I made that look illegible on purpose. Ignore me. Or read it. Whatever. I don’t care.
Hi everyone, I'm finally back with a new post! I've been busy, and I honestly forgot to check this blog (including the comments) for a while.
But I'm back now! Yay. :)
I'm still busy and stressing out. Not yay. :(
I was supposed to make this post around a month ago, but I kept on pushing it off. Enough of that. It's about time I posted this.
Yes, I made more avatars of my characters on a Picrew maker. I haven't made any new ones since. I think my Picrew obsession has finally started to die down, haha.
By the way, I chose the bloody version for designing my characters to fit with the theme.
What is the theme you ask? Well, it's "We Are The Broken" which used to be a saying I put on my blog banners. Check my Previous Blog Banners page to check them out.
Here's one of them (those editing skills though, oof-). heck,,:
.... I honestly miss editing like this, even though I think it looks pretty ridiculous now.
So yeah. Now you kinda understand what I'll be talking about. Ok, not really but eh.. good enough.
(The creator must have edited it since the last time I looked at it. Because, uh, well.. it now says, "only use in Twitter. or die" so lol guess I can't show you guys?? idk lol ok whatever.)
Well anyway, I'm gonna end this post with a bunch of videos of songs that remind me of that whole "We Are The Broken" thing I had going on.
Haha, I'm a disaster! :'D
..... and people down the hall are REALLY FREAKING LOUD. :-/
Anyway. Music. Yes.
"We Are The Broken" themed music. Ok ok ok,,, yes.
• Spanish class: For the past two classes, we watched the weirdest and most bizarre movie I’ve ever heard of and seen. It was ridiculous and full of inappropriate stuff. It also was very funny. I don’t know how to describe it. It was quite a movie. And on Tuesday, the professor left class just as it started. He didn’t come back. This class is weird, haha.
• This was like one of the only times that I don’t check my email right before class. So I rush to class. A few other classmates are there. Then a few minutes later and after class should’ve started, we check our emails and find out our professor suddenly canceled class. We were such fools. Having class canceled is a good thing though, haha.
• And I just came back to my dorm after watching the movie, Tangled, with some friends. That’s a good movie, guys. (* actually more like a half hour ago, pfft.)
That’s my day, basically.
Last weekend, I had anxiety over a mental health app. That’s the point of life where I’m at. Haha ahh.
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Before I forget again, I’ll tell you what I did a few weekends ago.
• That Sunday: Had a service event at a nearby beach. You might have heard of it. The Out of the Darkness walk. It was raining the whole time. During the walk, it started pouring. And since it was, like, at a beach, it was even colder and windier than if we were more in-land. Good cause though. Suicide prevention is important.
• That Saturday: I met my family in the city (NYC, I mean) and we saw the play, Hamilton. It was amazing.
Hi, I'm back with another assignment I submitted for my poetry writing class. (Yep, I submitted this. XD)
This is supposed to be a surrealism prose poem. Every idea I came up with was full of violence. Haha, I couldn't help myself.
I also had to read this out loud to the whole class. That was quite something.
This was written around the spookiest time of the year. I mean Halloween.
How's my attempt at writing horror/surrealism? Please tell me. I'm curious. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The Red Light You are driving home after a long day of work. There are no lampposts or store lights to lighten the path, and the moon and stars are not visible. Then a red light flashes ahead of you. You slam your foot on the gas pedal as you zoom towards it. As you approach it, it takes the shape of a traffic light. When the front of your car is only a few feet away from the traffic light, you are able to observe it up close. Its red light taunts you, which only motivates you to force the gas pedal to the melting asphalt below. Your car is overheating, burning the ground below, but you do not care. You are too attracted to the red light; it mesmerizes you. On closer inspection, you realize that the shape of the red light differs from that of the yellow and green. The red light is coming from a laser pointer. You have to catch it. Without thinking it through, you run the traffic light. After you pass it, you notice that the red light follows you. A red, round spot the size of the palm of your hand lands on your car’s windshield. Still feeling desperate to catch the red light, you unbuckle your seatbelt and stretch your arms in front of you. As your fingertips touch the glass, a red glow surrounds them. As the red glow drips down your hands, it takes the form of blood. Blood is in the air; blood is on your tongue. This does not horrify you; it is something you anticipated. Less than a minute after staring at the red spot on the windshield and your red hands, everything turns dark. The red light no longer hits the windshield; it simply vanished right in front of you. However, your fingers still feel wet and sticky; your hands are warm. The next thing you remember happening is the sound of the laser which emits the red light turning on and off again. Then the red light does not return; instead, the moon turns the sky yellow. All of a sudden, you see a cat—your cat— standing on its hindlegs and holding a gigantic laser pointer in your direction. The cat drops the laser, its red light spilling onto the ground, and approaches you to pick your car up. It unlocks a car door and grabs hold of you, cradling you in its paws. As the car crashes down into the near-boiling asphalt of the street, the cat scratches your head and tells you to eat your pet rabbit you hunted and killed in the morning. Then the cat leaves, and you stand on the roof of your car. You excitedly wait for your cat to play the red light game with you again and give you your dinner. The burning metal does not hinder your appetite for bloody rabbit. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Hope you enjoyed reading this! >:D
............. Yay, I'm able to insert images in my posts again. Just on the website, of course. I'm still feeling... pretty unhappy. I planned on posting this a little while back.
Sorry for not posting that much anymore. I’m sorry.
............... I feel so bad. Oh god.
I tried making a post with pictures in it the other day, but the images thing wouldn’t load for me.
Blogger Blogspot *sighs* :/
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Today I found out that one of my favorite dogs died a few days ago. No, not Sunshine (my dog). My cousins’ dog. I think I mentioned their dog on this blog before..? But I could be wrong. She was so sweet and playful. She’s an angel. I loved their dog so much, you guys. Yes, I’m sad that a dog that’s not even mine passed away. I’ll never be able to play with her again. Playing fetch with her was so fun. She was only 8 when she died. For comparison, Sunshine is 14. Their dog always wanted to play fetch when I visited their house. For comparison, Sunshine never played fetch. Their dog also gave lots of licks (“puppy kisses”). She was full of love. And... and. Oh god no. She’s... gone.
I forgot how many months ago, but I feel like it was also this year. One of my aunt’s cats died. I loved their cat a lot. He was very nice and soft. I loved seeing and petting him whenever I visited their house. But he passed away. I’m sad about that too.
I’ll never be able to see them again. I’ll never be able to pet them again. They’re gone. They’re... gone.
I loved them. I love my relatives’ pets. Seeing them always makes me smile.
The dog and cat I mentioned behaved more kindly to people than my own dog and cats. They were so nice.
Haha, I didn't feel bad at all after starting my new dose. :')
(heh heh,, nice!!)
My doctor told me there was a chance I would get side effects again.
But so far... I didn't. I didn't get nauseous last night after taking it this time around. I was able to fall and stay asleep (well, eventually).
I didn't feel terrible in the morning. I felt pretty good. I'm in a good mood.
Oh and I was productive today. I got everything that's due tomorrow done. And I finished my online homework that's due on Friday. I've been getting my online homework done way before they're due for a while now. Please clap for productive Cutepups. Thanks.
Hi, I promised a post before 7. It's just about 7 now.
Oof. .-.
I did some reading for a class in the afternoon. Then I went to Target. Took the school shuttle. That took a while. And now I'm doing laundry.
Wow, so exciting. /sarcasm
I bought some things to hopefully ease the nausea and insomnia that I bet I'm gonna get again. I've been delaying starting the new dose, and I finally am not doing much this weekend. So I guess I have a chance to start it now. Welp. Hope it doesn't kill me. :I
And I got staples. Like, you know, what you use for a stapler. I don't know how to put the staplers in. I'm a dumb-dumb. I tried using tutorials, but they didn't really.. work when I tried them.
Will I make an exciting post later?
I don't know.
I'm ending the post here, so it'll show the time as before 7 pm.
• Took a midterm exam (more like in-class essay). (boo..)
• Big/Little reveal!! Ahhhh!!!!!!!
I have no little though. :c
We went to BWW. I came back to my dorm a few minutes ago. Cutepups is living! XD
...... that’s pretty much it.
I’m planning on taking my higher dose of my medication tomorrow night.
Let’s see how that goes! (yeet)
I know none of you guys actually can remind me. But like. Hey. Remind me to make at least one post tomorrow. Preferably before 7 pm. Thanks y’all.
Haha, for today’s event I had to dress like it was the 1970s. Eh, I tried. It was fun though. ~GROOVY~
The new couch came in today, too. Ahh, I’m a little excited to come back home for Thanksgiving break! And not just to see my babies (I mean my pets of course) again.
Oh boy, I gotta update y’all on what happened last weekend. It was.. eventful. It was great. XD
Yeah, I’m gonna cut it off here. Good night, good day, good whatever time of day it is you read this.
Today (Saturday), I went to a nearby beach to do a beach clean-up with my Greek org. And yes, it was a little chilly out. It wasn’t that bad though.
It was pretty fun, to be honest. :)
My friend was picking up some shells, and she gave me these.
(pretty,,,)
<3 ~ :D ~ <3
This is what my group and I found on the beach. (Not a complete list):
• Bottle caps (mostly water and beer)
• Clear plastic bags
• Juul pods
• One (size 12?) shoe
• One outdoor chair you take to the beach or children soccer games (idk lol) with the bag too
• A big dead crab
• A dead fish head
....... uhhhhhh yeah.
Interesting objects, huh? Strange and interesting objects.
And then we all lowkey tried to look for dead bodies in the sand because something-something about a serial killer in the area (... 10 years ago, apparently?? lol).
I feel like I haven’t been updating my blog as much. Where have I been? Where am I? Heck, I don’t know!
Anyway, I keep on remembering that I said I was going to make a post about my dreams.
Right. Ok.
But like.. here’s the thing...
It’s hard for me to remember them now. It’s truly difficult. As soon as I wake up, everything that happened in the dreams I had while I was asleep vanish.
(I also found out that having more difficulty remembering dreams can be a result of taking the medication I now take. So there’s that.)
[Fun Game: count how many times I’ve typed ‘remember’ or ‘remembering’ already in this post. comment a number below. let’s have some fun!]
....... anyway. I’m suffering.
Monday was bad. That day was so bad. Man..
Today wasn’t as bad. I have a lot of reading and some studying to do though. I got exams on Thursday.
*sigh* ~~
Here’s a list of all I can remember from my recent dreams (aka barely anything):
1) • I’m in my dorm. Except it’s nothing like my actual dorm. In the dream, I’m in a triple (which means I have two roommates). The two girls who I share the room with are.. very girly. So is everyone else on the floor (which means all the neighboring rooms).
• In the dream, I’m sleeping. I’m not sure if I’m remembering it right, but I think there was a fish bowl on of the desks. It might have been mine.
• Then very late in the night, I’m awakened by my roommates entering our dorm. And then in the morning, I can’t find my medication. Later on, one of my roommates tell me they put my medication in the bathtub. There are no bathtubs in the restrooms where I am, by the way. The last thing I can remember is rushing to the bathtub in the public restroom in a panic, and picking up my bottle of medication.
2) • I had a dream last night/this morning. It was very intense and a lot must have happened. But all I can recall from it is something about a very cheesy omelette being made in a horrifying way.
3) • A few weeks ago, I had a dream about teeth. Not about my teeth falling out. It was something weirder than that. All I can remember from it now is being in a small room in a circle of either people my age or young teenagers, and a few (or maybe it was just one person?) people had brown teeth. It looked disgusting. The people with brown teeth said it happened because they went to the dentist and/or the oral surgeon. It was scary.
4) • My dad is very upset at me because I don’t have a job. That’s true, but the dream was still weird. He told me to get a job at Wawa. But every time he told me we were going to Wawa, we ended up being in a supermarket called Brick. This repeated over and over. Only I noticed we were in a supermarket, not Wawa. And it was called Brick. What kind of name is that? Brick. The last thing I remember from this dream is seeing a car mechanic shop next door to the Brick supermarket.
What do these dreams mean? I don’t know, man.
Hmm,, strange,,, strange indeed,,,,,,
[Fun Game 2: count how many times I’ve typed ‘medication’ and ‘dream’ in this post. comment a number below. let’s have some fun!]
Here’s J___. He always looks so fashionable, huh? He didn’t get a haircut in a while in this one. I also let him start to grow facial hair. That beard.. yeah, it looks good on you, ja boi. It makes him look a little less capable of being mistaken as a girl. Because these Picrews I’ve used make him look so girly. Or maybe that’s just me. Oh and this is the closest to his natural hair color. Maybe he dyed it gray and that’s fading. He also has part of his hair that’s still dyed purple. He’s wearing sunglasses to look cool. He’s so cool. Haha ok.
Here’s Fauna. She looks happy and sweet. That’s cute. This hair option reminded me of her. Not sure why. And yes, I used the same front hair option on Twinkle. They’re sisters. Uh yes ok.
Fierdan- story 1 and story 2+. I like this back head hair option. That sounds weird. Oh well. Messy hair boy,, mm hhmmffhgh.
Duke (story 1) // (integrated) Fierdan (story 2+). I don't know how to type. My glasses are dirty. My nose is a pain in the a-- nose*. He's a blushing boy. Hhhh. Heck.
Ryen. He's smiling this time! Well, kinda. He looks smug here. What are you looking at, dude? There's no gray eyes option for this one, so I let them bros have the same eye color. How shocking. Haha just kidding, I doubt anyone cares about that.
Twinkle. Stella. She looks like a boy here. Nice. This is when she has short hair but it's starting to grow out. And her hair is messy. I think messy hair fits her style. Do you really think she cares a lot about her hair? No fam, that's not how she rolls.
Dawn. The more I look at this, the more I dislike it. Oh well! I tried. Meh.
When you first entered the forest, you were scared. Shivering in fear, you didn’t know where to turn. That child from long ago had so much to learn— maybe the kids at school called you weird, and maybe that’s the first thing that brought you here. Hidden monsters made you afraid of the dark, but today, greeting them is a walk in the park. What happened to all of the fear? I know, you replaced it with apathy. You’ve been in the dark for so long that the monsters now live in your head. Believe me when I tell you they’re wrong. Your friends don’t pity you. They’re giving you sympathy. Take one step: Try to not spend all day in bed. -----------------------------------------------------------------
Hi everyone, I'm finally back with some new poetry! I'm not that sure on the title, but I submitted it as this. Oh yeah. I'm taking a poetry class at school, and this was the most recent poem I wrote for it. It's a Petrarchan sonnet (though we had some flexibility when it came to the syllables, so it didn't have to be ten per line).
I didn't really write poetry during the summer, and I feel like I'm a little rusty. (... maybe?)
Haha, I feel like I can only write poems about (my) mental health. So, uh, this one is more hopeful than a depressing old vent. I've been thinking about healing and recovery a lot lately. I want to be better. And yes, this poem is me @ me.
Which means it’s Mean Girls and Fullmetal Alchemist Day! Haha yeet!
XD lol haha ,,,,,,,
...... anyway.
It’s already October! Wow!
I’m so tired. oof-
It was so hot out yesterday. 90 something degrees. It’s fall now, this shouldn’t be happening.
The heat made me so tired when I finished all my classes for the day. I hate it.
I still have so much work to do for the assignments I have due today.
Ugh, another short paper. Ughhhhh-
So, uh, what I did. (yeah idk, just roll with it)
In two of my Monday and Wednesday classes, I’m learning about poetry and people’s poetry. Because, like, that’s what the class is about. And it’s the topic we’re currently discussing in the other class.
So vague. I know. I’m tired.
I got a good grade on my Spanish quiz. That’s good, I guess.
Kinda sorta idk-how-to-explain-it reading Shakespeare for another class.
I had a test in psychology yesterday. It was.. ok. Sure. It was pretty straightforward. I don’t know what else to say on that.
I have fall break starting this weekend, so I’m going home then. I get to see my pets. I can be with my Thelma,, yes,, very good.
We’re getting a new couch and flooring for one of the rooms in the house. That’s exciting. Something new. That’s like unheard of regarding anything in the house. This is different. Wow huh.
J___! This is how I designed ja boi. I had a hard time deciding between making his hair be white or this light blue gray-ish color. I went with the latter as you can see because I like that color more. Haha yeah. Ok.
Long-haired Twinkle! In a ponytail! Wow, that's exciting! Ok.
Short-haired Twinkle! Less blush, more anger. She's sad too. Ok.
Long-haired Duke/Fierdan! What emotion is on his face? I can't tell! Bitter-happy? Cynical? He looks a little too happy to be pressing a gun to his head. Well then. Ok.
Short-haired Duke/Fierdan! I wanted to do a 180 in emotions. 180 degrees.. yeah ok. He's still smiling though. Now he looks less impulsive and excited to shoot himself in the head.. but he still wants to. I'll admit that. Aww, fiery disaster man! Please live,, your life will get better at some point! And he's crying. Ouch. Ok.
Ryen! He kinda looks like.. baby. Look how cute he is! He looks so lost and confused. Probably because he's not wearing his glasses. Haha. I didn't like the glasses option on this Picrew to put on Ryen, so I didn't use them. Ok.
Dawn! She has darker brown hair than this, but this was the only brown hair option. Yes, I used the same skin tone for her as I did on Duke/Fierdan and Ryen. What of it. So yeah, that's it. Ok.
I wanted to make an Ardere avatar, but none of the hair color options were anywhere close to his hair color. Oh darn. What a shame. :(
I kept on intending to make a few posts about J___ so you guys can know him better, but I never did that. He's more than just a happy all the time, funny-man kind of guy. He's been through some dark times.
Gosh, I love him. I love all of them.
Alright! Now I shall do some reading and studying.
Hi guys, it’s been a while. I haven’t been going on here for around a week.
I’ve been using the app, Habitica. I feel a little more productive now, haha. I feel the most productive I’ve been in a long time.
(Well, except when it comes to posting on here. ha, ha, ha,,)
I don’t have any classes tomorrow. All my professors canceled class. Yay.
Happy Rosh Hashanah! :)
Oh yeah. This weekend was parents/family weekend at my college. So my parents came to visit me.
We went to the same restaurant we went to last year. And we went to this bakery.
We got cookies and a few Halloween-themed cupcakes.
This is the cupcake I picked out for myself. :3
Cute witch cupcake! I’m still obsessed with it! (I ate it though..)
Then in the morning we traveled to visit the place where my sister is currently living. We went to a very nice restaurant by the water for brunch/lunch.
It was so nice. Much better than the food on campus, that’s for sure.
Here’s a picture of the view we had. :’)
<3
And today I was walking back from an event with a few friends, and we saw one of the cats on campus. The cats are kinda famous on campus, haha.
I finally saw one this semester!
Cute, grumpy boy. <3 (... or girl.)
So that’s it for the pictures update. I’ll be back soon. I swear.
heheheheheheeee byeee ~~~~~
~ Cutepups
(Wow, I didn’t type that for a while. Anyway yeah. Bye for now!)
And honestly? You know what? Today has been a good day. This is a nice Thursday.
(Apart from having a nosebleed in the morning. But whatever.)
The weather’s nice. I took a quiz. It was pretty easy. I didn’t blank out in my other class like I did last week. That class was interesting this time, haha.
I actually feel pretty mentally stable today. I’m strangely in a good mood. I feel.. happy? I feel like I can actually get things done.
Ok so, I downloaded this app called Habitica. I think I put it somewhere under my Support pages..? Anyway yeah, I’m using that app now.
Oh and I’ve been having these intense dreams lately. They’re not exactly nightmare content, but they are intense alright. I might make a post about everything I can remember from the recent dreams I had.
[EDIT: Apparently, having intense/vivid/‘realistic’ dreams more often can happen as a result of taking the medication I’m now on, so uh.. there’s that. And yes, the dreams I’m referring to were vivid and had quite a ‘realistic’ (but also not really) quality to them.]
I hope all of you had/have a good day.. or at least a decent one.
I had my first papers due on Monday and Tuesday (yesterday and today) for my English classes.
Welp.. haha.. hope I didn’t completely fail......
No paper due Wednesday. Yay.
Anyway, I haven’t been posting as often. It’s not necessarily because I’m busy. Like most of the time if I’m not getting food, in class, doing coursework or whatever, or.. idk, sleeping I guess? I’m probably on tumblr, maybe deviantart as well but I haven’t been checking on there as much either, or watching YouTube or Netflix... or watching MDZS / The Untamed (such a good show,,). Or I’m at some event for the Greek org I’m in. So... yeah. That’s it basically.
So what else happened these past few days? Well, uh...
The fire alarms in my residential building went off two nights in a row (if I remember correctly). It was very annoying. The first time was at 2:20-something, I think, and the next one was just before 3 in the morning. On Monday morning. That was fun! :-} /s.
(note: “/s” means sarcasm)
Oh oh oh-
I didn’t blank out while in my last class (the one on Tuesdays and Thursdays). I feel proud of myself. :)
(Last Thursday, I had such a hard time understanding what was going on and concentrating for long. Yeah haha, I was a wreck.)
Time: becomes midnight
Me: ok. fine.
I think I’m getting out of that weird, bad funk, that all ~ getting used to taking new meds ~ thing. I mean, I really hope I am?? lol.
I don’t experience brain fog as much now compared to the past few weeks. My mind doesn’t blank out as much, and I don’t suddenly forget what I was thinking/doing. So that’s good.
I’ve also been able to experience hunger again. And my sleeping has somewhat improved. So.. yeah, that’s good too.
What else? What else?
Oh yeah. That drawing of J___ I posted around a month ago? I finally outlined it and started to color it.
Yeah idk, I feel slightly less anxious, on-edge, and irritable (for no actual reason) now. It feels.. nice. I still get annoyed (*cough* fire alarm going off at 3 am), but it’s not all the time. Because I used to get irritable a lot, pretty much every day,, upsetting my family.... yeah, it was bad.
I’m still adding songs to my characters’ music playlists. I like doing that.
Here are two updates I feel like sharing with you guys:
1. Yesterday in my Spanish class, my professor decided to start the class by teaching us how to swear in Spanish. I thought this was hilarious.
And I just checked one of the phrases on a translation website, and the pronunciation of it (and the English translation) is making me laugh. Haha, it’s great.
I originally had this post idea in early-to-mid August. So it’s been a few weeks. Sorry for the delay.
... oh right lol- what’s this all about?
It’s a list.
I’ve been going over the aspects of the story that I’ve been avoiding going into detail about. It mainly has to do with the fact that I still just.. don’t know enough information to write about some of these things. I’m stuck on what to say and how to explain some important details to the story.
I also don’t really have experience of dealing with that kind of stuff. Ahem.. ^-^”
So yeah. I know I haven’t been mentioning these things in regards to the story.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The list:
• Jobs. The jobs the characters have. Especially starting in story 2 when they’re all together.. well, for the most part. What job does Ryen have? What about the others? What work do they do? Is it the same or different from something involving their Elemental Powers?
• Elemental Powers. The main characters have special abilities that I call “Elemental Powers” but I haven’t talked about them in ages. What can each character do with theirs? What is the purpose of having it in the first place? How do the characters benefit from using them?
(Examples: Fierdan and fire. Stella (Twinkle) and ice-fire. Dawn and earth. Ardere and lightning. etc.)
• Medications. The majority of the protagonists gang is mentally ill and traumatized in some way. Fierdan, Ryen, and Dawn are the first characters to come to my mind. But so does J___. What medications would they take for their.. disorders? From PTSD to depression to ADHD? I just.. don’t know enough.
• Details of Abuse. I’ve said that Ryen, Dawn, and Duke were abused in various ways during their childhoods. However, I never went into explicit detail on what those ‘abuses’ consisted of. What abusive behavior did they fall victim to? Going into detail haunts me a little. The same could be said for Fierdan when he’s a teenager, and then how that resulted in affecting Dawn.
• The Main World. (aka- the world outside story 1). How does it work? What are the different sections of it? Different towns or cities? Different ways of life? Social classes? How does education work? Actually, about that- Ryen and J___ had vey different schooling when growing up. How did that affect them? How did the different social classes they grew up in affect the type of person they each become?
