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Saturday, April 8, 2017

um hi

Um hi. It's finally spring break for me. A break from school. Finally.

I slept for 12 hours. What the heck. My sleeping cycle thing is all over the place.

I also feel kinda sick now. So that's just so great. Feeling bad not just mentally but physically too when it's break.

Hahahaaaaaa. :'}}

Well, I have a good thing to mention. I got a high B on my math quiz from yesterday. That means a lot since I usually get Cs to low Fs on math quizzes. Haha nice.

Ugh. Got my SAT class tomorrow. Heh.

I'm playing with my hair right now. I'm a fool who does foolish things. Ok that's how I roll. So I've been thinking. I'm not going to grow my hair out long (to mid-back) again for a long while. Yeah lol nobody cares whatever.

Anyone want to see my terrible art I've been working on?

Is anyone going to comment?

I don't know.

Ugh, why am I so tired?

How is it almost 1 pm for me?

?????????

I might come back later.

Friday, April 7, 2017

tbh -

Ok. I'm done. I don't care. Here goes.

I was working on something for 2 hours only to find out it didn't work correctly. Wow thanks dA. :))

Technology stinks sometimes. It can just be like working against you (me). Not just for dA though. Other things too. Such as school assignments. 

Whew, I'm annoyed. It's past midnight. I don't care, I already took a mid-afternoon nap.

Now onto other things. :'))

I'm always wondering things like, "Why do I even bother to continue this story?" because well. I'm doubting myself again. I think the whole story is a gross joke. Like come on now lmao. Why do I even try? Why don't I just quit and leave forever? My writing is so stupid. Like what even is Twinkle's Story? What are they? Foxes, humans? This story, gah. Do people besides myself have the thought of "freaking furries" in the back of their minds when thinking of the story? Or is it just me being a fool filled up to the brim with self-hatred? Ughhhhh. Kill me.

I doubt I'll be calm and genuinely happy for a while. I just can't right now.

I'm so stressed over school. Grades and exams, especially.

I'm stressing out over the end of April to the end of May.

I'm scared of failing a class. I'm stupid, my brain's stupid, I'm stupid. I have almost literally no motivation to do anything that doesn't involve anything fictional. I hate studying. But obviously I have to. I procrastinate way too much, and I just can't focus myself to actually get work done.

I'm terrified of tests. SAT, AP exam, driver's test. I'm so scared and being calm is just as unhealthy as being full of anxiety. I need to care, but I don't until it's too late. Studying and practice are hard for me to motivate myself to do.

I don't know anymore. I can't hold conversations with people unless I actually like them and the topic. I'm too shy to talk to people. I'm way too sensitive to rejection and criticism. I have limited energy and get tired easily. I don't do much, but I still nap a lot. I don't volunteer all the time. I don't have a job. I don't play sports. I hate my art and don't see the point in practicing anymore. I can't word things right in text or out loud. I embarrass and make a fool out of myself. I ruin relationships. I don't know how I'll live as an adult at this rate. I can't imagine myself living past 18. It's toxic thinking, I know, but it sounds realistic to me. I don't know how I'll live.

For the past few weeks and now, I've been feeling that I only enjoy life because of fictional things. Real life things are way too scary and stressful. Except for very few things. My pets and my family are all I can think of. But even those things make me stressed.

Stressed. So stressed. So much stress.

At least it's Friday. One more day until spring break. Finally.

Oh no. Can't relax though. Stressed about school later today. Of course. Always have to be stressed. Always kinda want to die. No worries don't exist.

My stomach and neck have been lowkey hurting every day this week. And ever since last night, my throat has too. It's not like big pain though. It's like a minor inconvenience pain. Ugh, I hate this. Hate lots of stuff.

I feel like I'm only happy if I'm distracted enough to not think too much. TV shows and Twinkle's Story are good distractions for me.

But when I think too much about the story, it definitely doesn't make me happy. It just adds another thing of stress.

Life gives no breaks. It never stops.

:/ :/ :/ :/

Tuesday, April 4, 2017

um ok

Hi. *throws a post at you* :)

So anyway. That thing I said I about going out for a while last post? Well, haha, I actually didn't do that thing.

Someone was going to take me, but then said person realized that they couldn't take me. So I couldn't really go to the thing.

Oh and I also have two projects that I'm still procrastinating on doing. Haha fun.

I hate making iMovies. Everything's so complicated. Gah, I can't stand it.

Today sure was a rollercoaster of emotions. Whew, I get too many of those in a day. Tired, happy, confident, wanting to die, embarrassed, annoyed, frustrated, feeling like everything relating to school is working against me, chill, tired, umm?? what a wide range.

Haha wtf.

Uh, have a skit.

Me 1: lol you're getting a haircut today
Me 2: lol yeah you sure are
Me 1: here's my plan- cut all your hair off
Me 2: what?! no!!
Me 1: face it, you hate having hair in your face when it's down, your hair is too thick, you look decent enough with it short--
Me 2: that was like 6 years ago, you dumb dumb!
Me 1: but that person--
Me 2: it would be impossible to have my hair look the same as theirs
Me 1: hair is annoying
Me 2: we all know what you're gonna do, foolish cutepups. you're just gonna cut off one inch.
Me: cuts off three inches. wow what a rebel :^)

Rip me. *sinks into grave.. i mean bed?*

So onto the next topic- self confidence and self esteem.

If you know me long enough, you would know that I have very little or none of that.

Haha wow so fun.

So when I do something wrong and in front of a lot of people, I.. uh.. want to die? umm.

Want to know why I call myself a fool? It's because I am one. Gosh, what's so hard to understand?

I say something to a teacher and I did the thing not completely right and the class is looking- like hello there embarrassment.

Why do I even speak? I messed up. Haha why bother. I'm a fool who should just go. Leave and hide.

Man, it's so easy for me to have my confidence zapped away from me. It's so hard to get it. But so easy to have taken away. Which really sucks.

I made myself look like a fool. Gosh ok. Tone down the anxiety. Yeah sure. That's easy for someone else to say.

Mm haha social anxiety feels. Mm relatable.

It's like I can't ever do anything right. I constantly mess something up when it comes to teacher.

Hahahahaaaaaaaaaaa I hate school.

Monday, April 3, 2017

Sunshine day

Get it? Since today's her birthday. Erm yeah.

I love dogs lol.

I love cats too lol. I don't do pet birthday posts for my cats because I don't know their birthdays, unfortunately.

Today was a sunny day in my.. uh.. general location. Yeah, general location lol.

I think I vented on this day last year. I vented a lot last year. This blog is a cursed heck site full of pre-2017 cryptid me.

Watch me slowly turn this post into a vent. Omg lmao.

I'll be surprised if I post between Tuesday and Thursday. I'm so busy with stuff. And by that, I mean school things. For the most part.

I'm in the middle of working on a project as I'm typing this post. I hate projects like these.

One project down. Two to go.

*screams into the void*

I'm going out tomorrow. And of course that's the day it's raining. Uh, I'll complain more about this later.

In the meantime, let's talk about April and May.

*screams louder into the void*

So guys. It's April. Don't know what that means? Well, I'll tell you.

April is the month of "studying like hell" for me. Maybe for you too. I don't know your personal lives, so I don't know about you. But for me? I gotta study a lot this month.

Time to cry? Um lol?

If I somehow force myself to go inactive on here and other sites you might know me on, it's probably because I'm busy studying and stressing.

1) SAT
2) AP exam

Big tests. Very stressful. Gotta do lots of preparations. Lots of studying- and actual studying at that.

Both are during the first week of May. Haha, the time to suffer.

I'm starting a new SAT refresher course this Sunday. So that means I have to get a good score when I take it in May. Or else I'm screwed. Ha, ha.

My AP exam is supposedly one of the hardest ones. Haha, so great right. I'm terrified. Real life sucks.

And if that's not enough, my birthday is next month and I'm terrified about that too.

"But why, Cutepups? Why are you terrified about your birthday? :)" you ask.

Well. Well, well, well then. Time to explain to those who don't get what it means.

Ok sure yeah. :")

Where I -the fool who is called Cutepups- am from, there's this thing you have to do on your 17th birthday. It's called the driver's test. The test where you actually drive a car.

Driving makes me nervous in general. I still suck at parking. Being alone with strangers makes me a little nervous. I have anxiety (about this).

It was scary enough for me to take driving lessons. But knowing that I have to take the test on my birthday because it has to be that way and having the pressure of my siblings who easily passed theirs the first time.. well, it's making this feel a lot more terrifying than lessons.

*screams for a longer time into the void*

Ok I'm done. :")

Anyway, I just feel like saying this. I love Danny/Fierdan as a character. As a character. That doesn't mean I love and excuse all his actions. Because let's face it. He is filthy trash who is evil and he's bad. I actually do hate who he is. Being a killer and constantly saying it wasn't him.. mm Fierdan, that's not okay. That's messed up, dude. I don't know how to actually word things, so bare with me. I really love Fierdan because he's one of the only main characters that my story-planning and thinking has gotten so deep in. Like, um, the complexity of his character (is he evil? is he good?- spoilers) just makes him so interesting to me. That's what I love. I feel like what I say feels like I'm glorifying him and his actions, but that's not exactly the case on point. Honestly, it likely is because I'm in the middle of planning out pre-Fierdan chapters where it's all about the gang as humans and his father. And like. There are reasons why the brothers hated their father so much. It kinda makes the fact that Fierdan killed him not seem as demonic savagery. Due to all that's happened. But like. Killing anyone is pretty much demonic savagery. So like. Fierdan. Evil? Not as evil as originally thought? Actually a pretty good guy? Well, I don't know. All three maybe? Ok maybe two.

In Chapter 70, Fierdan- or would it be better to say Danny since he's more human?- has downright accepted the fact that he can't fully turn back human- the fangs and nails mentioned in the chapter- because killing people made him lose his humanity (in the metaphorical sense). This basically means that he, in some way, knows he's a monster. So how would post-Fierdan look? Who knows at this point. There's also the Duke factor to include in post-Fierdan. So it's a mystery.

And back to elaborating on that part above about complaining and rain.

I'm going to be outside for a while tomorrow because of this thing. Outside is possible rain.

When I get my haircuts, I get my hair straightened too. Which means I got my hair straightened in that fancy salon style way.

Rain + haircut don't mix.

Haha. Life is funny, huh?

My hair is actually so curly that having it straightened is probably making it look at least an inch longer than it usually is.

Haha. Who is this Cutepups fool, amirite?

Oh and I changed my mind. I, according to what my dad said, "didn't get my head shaved."

I mean yeah. My hair's noticeably shorter than before. But it's not short-short. If you know what I mean.

To make it story relatable, my hair is as long as it looks in my profile pic of Duke.

Gotta make it relatable. To the story. To my guy.

*screams into the void again*

Happy birthday, Sunshine.

ily ♡

Sunday, April 2, 2017

heckin hair

Hey. I won't only be talking about the story for this post. I'll be talking about other stuff.

(gasp)

But here's the story info for this post:

I won't be posting new chapters in the middle of the week. This time I mean it. Chapter 72 will have to wait a little longer.

Right now, I only have Fauna's POV vaguely planned out for the next chapter.

Now onto stuff that's not story-related lol.

I'm very busy these next few days, so don't be alarmed if I don't make any quality posts for a little while.

Ugh, school stuff. Sigh. Stressing me out. :/

Turning away from that, tomorrow is Sunshine's birthday. My dog is turning 12!

My doggo is getting old! *gasp* :0

Um, what else? How about fun fact time? Yeah ok sure.

I've been posting lots of chapters and story-related posts because I'm avoiding the fact that I have to deal with stressful real life stuff in a boring and dreadful reality. :-)

Honestly, over half of my thoughts are about fictional characters in fictional worlds. Pfft, what real life?

All this fiction makes me feel alive and have a reason to enjoy life.

I don't know how I'll live without fictional worlds lol.

Real life is scary and stressful. :c

Anyway, I can't stop thinking about Fierdan/Danny. The only reason I have Fauna's POV vaguely planned out is because I'm thinking of the characters- Fierdan/Danny, Dawn, and (insert brother name)- a lot. Perhaps all of them have a part in the next chapter.

Fierdan's side of things. More explanations into the complicated past.

I seriously have to think of names for certain characters. They need names- I know, I know!

Hhhhngfgh. ;^;

Ok, ok. Now I'm done with talking about story things.

Uh, I saw the new Beauty and the Beast movie today. Lol yeah.

So I guess you're wondering why I titled this post with that title. Now I'll go into that.

Ayy lmao.

I'm getting a haircut tomorrow. So I was thinking of my hair.

I kinda want to have my hair cut short. But I'll probably be too scared to do that.

Just like last time. Sigh. :/

My hair is a thick mess. I'm a cryptid fool with a "bleeding neck" of heck. Lol hey.

I kinda like the color my hair is when it's wet more than when it's dry. Gotta love darker colored hair.

(Shut up, Cutepups. Just stop it. Gosh.)

I've daydreamed quite a few times of me having a part of my hair dyed blue. Because then I'll actually be Blue (which is another name I go by online).

Gosh, I love fantasies. Me with part of my hair blue. Haha what.

Sometimes when I'm looking at my real name for too long, I feel disconnected. Like wow. That's my name.

It's such a weird feel. Reading my name in text messages feels so weird to me. It's like. I'm the one with the name. I'm her. Who is she? Who am I?

Gah, I can't even explain.

Back to my hair lol.

Sometimes I daydream about me dressing up as my characters. As humans. Duh.

Me having Twinkle's new hair style. Me having Duke's current or past hair style. Um.. heck.

Me having their outfits. Ummmm Danny boy.

(I told you to stop it, Cutepups.)

I kinda feel like my hair would look better if I dyed part of it red instead of blue. But red is an angry intense color. I'm not a red person. I'm a blue person. I'm blue. Blue.

I'm thinking too much lol.

Hair lol. My hair. Haha. What a joke.

Ok bye. c; 


Saturday, April 1, 2017

Fool Post

Hey. It's April Fool's Day, and I'm a fool. Have this awful post as a gift.

Uh......

I wanted to post a drawing today, but then I realized I can't color.

I like Chapter 71 so much. Omg I love it.

Cliffhangers are everywhere.

I'm going to post the wip of a drawing I'm working on at the end of this post.

Anyway, have some short skits and possible previews for upcoming chapters.

:~)

Mmmmmmmmmm.

Duke/Fierdan/Danny (yes all three): I'm as straight as a straight line.
Everyone else: No.
Danny: Lol yeah true.
Duke: What?
Danny: I love him.
Everyone + Duke: Who?
Rainbow: falls from space
Rainbow: gay!
Precious: the correct term is ______.
Danny: bi lol leaves and dabs.

The heck?????

After Fauna's POV in Chapter 71...

Fauna: omg it's senpai
Fierdan: i'm senpai 8)
Me: omg i love you
Me: i love you
Me: gets kicked out like a fool
Me: cries
Fauna: anyway hey there boy ;)
Fierdan: your outfit sucks
Fauna: hey ;(
Fierdan: *uses magic to change her clothes; no they aren't naked shut up*
Fauna: whoa this looks nice
Fierdan: unlike dawn, i can't change my own clothes by using magic
Fauna: oh you're still epic senpai
Fierdan: i've used very complex magic more complex than dawn's. so.
Fauna: that's cool
Fierdan: like why does everyone think me and her were in a romantic relationship?
Fauna: even dawn said you kissed--
Fierdan: kissing =/= romance/sexual love
Fauna: uh the records
Fierdan: shut up gosh just pour gasoline on me
Fauna: didn't you do that to duke?
Fierdan: lol yeah
Fierdan: i know dukle won't last forever. stupid cliche.
Fauna: what no way
Fierdan: boys though
Fauna: mmmm
Fierdan: here lol
(Picture of Duke screaming yeet)
Fierdan: DannyX[Dylan] name subject to change
Fauna: what the

That wasn't really a spoiler. Umm.

Past - Human World...

Danny and Dawn: painting
Bro: I gotta go
Danny: what why
Bro: coding
Zios: your brother is weak
Bro: what no
Danny: wearing pastel colors, loves flowers, likes to draw and is a writer in a weird way
Dawn: haha cute

The famous quote could possibly be returning too. But the Fierdan version.

Then after that, the Duke reprise version will come.

Quote: "There's a part in all of us that wants to be free."

I might add a Twinkle version as well.

Very emotional. Way more emotional than the first time it shows up in the story in Chapter 21.

Chapter 21. I used to think that chapter was my best one. Haha omg lmao wrong.

The Duke and Taurel parallel. I'm screaming.

I'm drawing pre-Fierdan and post-Fierdan. (spoilers omg)

Danny boy Danny boy Danny boy Danny boy Danny boy Danny boy

I love.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

April Fool's! :^)

I'm not posting any drawings for this post.

I'll post pictures of something else.

I'll let it be a surprise.

Omg last year. I thought I quit the story, but I'm writing new chapters this year.

Ok bye.

♡♡♡

Twinkle's Story: Chapter 71

TAUREL

The knocking at the door wakes me up. Before I even open my eyes, I can feel the warmth of the sunlight filtering through the window. While running my fingers through my dark hair, I get out of the bed.

The knocking continues, but it sounds more urgent this time. I sigh but walk in the opposite direction of the door. I stop at a mirror on the back wall. I bring my left wrist up to my mouth and begin to tear off the ends of the bandages that wrap around it with my teeth.

Ouch, this freaking hurts. But the sacrifice I made will be worth it in the end. Because in the end, there will be no Fierdan or anyone like him to threaten society with their unnatural powers. 

After unwrapping another layer of the many bandages, I see a lot of red. There's still plenty of blood. I grimace at the sight as I wrap the two outer layers of bandages around my wrist.

"Sorry to bother you, Taurel sir," I hear Risak's voice by the door. "I started worrying about you. I thought you wanted to start on our search for Fierdan first thing today. I'm ready to go."

I throw clothes on the bed. While changing my clothes, I still hear his voice.

"It just passed eleven am. I was ready to go at eight like you ordered, but I noticed that you weren't up yet. I didn't want to bother you, sir, but this is ridiculous. We are four hours late."

Shoot, it's already eleven! 

"Sparkle and the wolf are already here. We're all waiting for you."

I stumble over my feet as I hurry to the door. I open the door to find an impatient Risak tapping his foot and muttering to himself.

"I'm ready," I say. "Let's go."

He scans me up and down and nods. I follow him out into the hallway.

"Everything is packed, correct?" I ask.

Risak looks over his shoulder and says, "Of course and everything is secure, Taurel sir."

I grin when he calls me 'Taurel sir' and say, "Excellent. Good work."

When we reach the end of this hallway, I hear Risak sigh.

"I can't wait till my time comes. I'm anticipating the time I'll have with Fierdan," he rubs his paws together. "Torturing sounds exciting."

"The Duke Fierdan," I correct him. "And yes, we will have a splendid time with him."

We enter a wide room with a round table located in the center of it. I see Sparkle and the wolf leader sitting at chairs. When I focus on the wolf, I smirk for just a moment.

Should I tell Risak my plan on how to capture Duke? Do I trust him enough to keep a secret? No, I don't. This plan is one that should only be heard by one set of ears.

Risak sits down in a chair, but I stay standing.

Sparkle coughs and then says, "So let me get this straight. Getting Duke will make him unable to control phantoms because he will be under our supervision, right? We will end the war between citizens and phantoms once and for all, right guys?"

I glance at Risak before looking directly at her. Risak nods as I tell her, "Yes, we will bring justice and peace to fox territory at long last by having Duke drained of his power and energy."

Oh, how I love to lie. Getting the Duke Fierdan has nothing to do with stopping a war. I'm only after him because of who he is. He's the living Fierdan. He deserves to have all the pain he caused my family and so many others directed right back at him.

I bite my lip when I hear the wolf speak. "What about my son? When does finding him come into play?"

Oh, you poor wolf. You stupid, stupid wolf.

"We will find your son, I promise," I say.

He never specified on alive or dead. Either way, I'll make sure he finds his son. One way or the other.

A few minutes pass before I stand on an empty chair. I study all their very different faces and raise my left arm. Some of the bandages come off.

"Today begins the first day of our journey that will change history forever. The era of fear and shame because of Fierdan will finally come to an end. We will make him fall and surrender."

I pause when I see and listen to their clapping. I raise my arm higher.

"I will be the leader of this mission. From now on, I will be referred to as the One-Pawed Savior."

FINNY

"Are you sure this is a good idea?" I ask while following her up a rocky hill.

Without looking behind her to look at me, she replies with a simple yes.

I shrug and continue to follow her. I notice the leaves on the trees. A few leaves are only just starting to change colors. The few orange-red leaves stand out against the dark green ones.

The orange leaves remind me of Duke.

I was so close to betraying him. I couldn't even save Sparkle from knowing the truth about Taurel and Risak's evil intentions. What a pathetic friend I must be.

I sigh deeply as I remember an event from several months ago. That time feels like a lifetime ago.

We were at my place. More specifically, my bedroom. 

We were dressed up in the same outfit. Big sleeveless shirts, gold and silver chained necklaces, sports caps. We looked ridiculous, but it was so fun.

Duke adjusted my cap and smiled at me with his eyes shining brightly. "You look great," he said while struggling not to giggle.

I patted his arm and said, "You look great too."

He failed at trying to hide his amusement. He broke into laughter, which made me laugh as well.

Duke wrapped his arm around the top half of my back. We looked at ourselves in the mirror. 

"One day, we'll make it big. You and me, Fin. We'll become so famous that crowd after crowd will be cheering our names."

A long time ago, Duke and I dreamed of becoming famous when we grew up. I can only assume that Duke didn't mean becoming famous for being the physically living Fierdan. I can only assume that he never wanted to become famous in the way that almost everyone is terrified of him or wants him dead.

 Back then, we dreamed of becoming a famous rock-rap combo duo. That was why we would often dress up as our favorite band members and sing some of our favorite songs of theirs. We would both sing the lyrics, but that changed when we started with our own music.

Duke denied it as being good every time I complimented his songwriting. I honestly was surprised when he showed me one song he wrote. When we were in school, he never tried that hard. He got in trouble a lot; I sent him the homework that, of course, he copied from me. Only me and him were in on this singing duo thing, so he only showed me the lyrics he wrote. It made me learn that Duke has a way with words. He can word things in a way that I can't help but to admire.

I remember that at one point, I said, "When we're older, we can get piercings and matching tattoos."

Duke glanced down at his chest for just a second before looking at me again. "Uh yeah. Tattoos. Of course."

We weren't as enthusiastic after that happened. 

After a while, I got a text on my phone. I put my phone back in my pocket and said, "You better go. My girlfriend is coming here in under a half hour."

Duke, after taking off his cap and necklaces, sighed. "Admiral, you mean? Dude, you know she doesn't actually love you, right?"

I sighed too. "You're only jealous because you don't have a girlfriend. Maybe if you weren't so stuck up, you would have had plenty by now."

"I felt nothing between any of those girls. If I'm going to ever date someone, I have to love them and they have to love me back. If it doesn't work both ways, then dating is pointless."

"Oh, I almost forgot," I added. "Maybe you will fall in love if you stopped closing people off from knowing anything about you. We're best friends, Duke. Even I don't know that much about you. For one, you never told me about your life before you moved to Sparkle's house."

He raised one of his paws, indicating me to stop. "Shut up, Finny. Maybe I wasn't meant to be involved in fake love like you and the majority of the grade. Maybe I wasn't meant to love girls."

I arched an eyebrow. "What do you mean?"

He looked at the floor. "You're the only non-relative of mine that I feel comfortable being close to. I mean, well, there used to be Daredevil. But then the accident happened, and he got paralyzed. I haven't seen him since."

Duke vaguely talking about Daredevil- if that even was his real name, which I doubt- was the only thing I knew about Duke's past. When I tried to get more out of him, he would tell me that he doesn't want to talk about anything else from his past. 

He looked up. "Do I have to go?"

I sighed. "Yes."

Right when Duke was about to leave my room, I said, "I don't know how you felt about Daredevil, but I'll tell you this. If you're trying to tell me that you love me as more than a friend, then quit it right now. Get a girlfriend since that should be easy for you, so then you can't be bitter about Admiral and me."

That's when he left. 

She finally looks back at me.

"We're here."

Then she knocks on the cold rock.

Out comes an arctic wolf.

They must have been close in the past because they know each other's name.

"We need your help."

He smiles.

"I'll do anything for you, Calliah."

DUKE

"This makes no sense," I say before throwing another ball of black fire.

Dawn, sitting on a bench, arches an eyebrow. "How is that so?"

I throw another ball of black fire from my other paw.

I'm almost certain that Dawn is crazy. Perhaps even crazier than what I originally thought of her.

"I understood you when you told us that we could use our Elemental Powers to defeat the phantoms, but this?" I throw more black fire. "This is ridiculous. Black fire correlates to phantoms."

Dawn stands up. "That's where you're wrong. Purple fire correlates to phantoms because of how toxic they are. Black fire is only considered bad because it can kill people that come in contact with it. Well, that got me thinking. Maybe black fire has some good traits too."

I pause from creating and throwing black fire. I press my paws together, palm to palm, just to make sure I haven't kept any excess black fire on me.

"You can't be serious," I say as I face her. "Black fire can't obliterate phantoms."

"There has to be something good about black fire," she says. "That was the color fire Fierdan used since he hated how orange fire reminded him of his father."

"Fierdan only used black fire because it can kill people. That's the only reason why he used it."

Dawn sighs, and I throw my arms down at my sides.

"I've lived with Fierdan for years. I believe I know more about him than you do," she says.

I stare directly into her green eyes. "Yeah and I'm technically Fierdan. How could you possibly know more about him than me?"

Dawn chuckles. "Oh Duke, you don't yourself at all then."

TWINKLE

I've been growing impatient, so I decided to get it over with today. While Dawn took Duke into the empty space by the artillery room, I got my chance.

I took the pair of scissors from one of Dawn's drawers. Then I ran into my room with it.

Now I'm sitting on my bed with my hair tied up and the scissors in my lap. Right now, my hair reaches nearly the middle of my back.

I'm never going back. I have changed for the better. 

I take a deep breath and then grab the scissors.

Do I really want to go through with this?

I hesitate for just a moment.

Of course I do. I'm no longer that weak girl I used to be for so long.

Then I feel the blades of the scissors against the back of my neck. They feel cold.

I move the scissors right below my hair tie.

That's where I start cutting.

It takes me a little while until I'm completely done.

The tie, having been cut in half, falls onto the bed. I toss it in the trash bin and head toward the bathroom.

I smile at my new appearance in the mirror.

My hair is so short now. It only reaches my chin. It's shorter than Duke's.

I love how the orange strands of my hair look far better now. They kind of leave an orange spiral shape that stands out against the rest of my hair that's blue.

I run my paws through the bottom of my hair, pushing more of it forward on either side of my face.

I love this new me. I'm never going back to the past. I haven't just changed.

I make my eyes flash entirely icy blue.

I have transformed.

FAUNA

I blink my eyes a few times before opening them. I almost lose my breath.

Where am I now? I don't see white or any golden light anywhere. Did I accidentally leave heaven?

I sit up. The only color that I see is black.

Before I can think anything through, I hear a guy's voice.

"Hello Fauna," the voice says from behind me.

Still completely confused on how I could be here, I turn around.

Duke? What is he doing here?

I stammer. "D-Duke?"

He laughs.

Wait, what's so funny?

His palms face up as his arms are down on either side of him.

"Welcome to Cincernum."

No. No way. It can't be. He isn't a spirit or hollow body. He's a complete body. Has he really been living alone down here in this black goop dump for years?

Still stammering, I say, "Y-You're..."

He smiles. It doesn't look evil though.

"I'm not my toy. I would prefer it if you called me by my real name," he says.

I stare at his face. Duke has a small white speck to the right of his nose. He does not.

"Fierdan," I whisper.