Hi, I’m back. This is going to actually be a short post.
I haven’t made that many posts this year. Yeah mhmm. It’s just that I don’t feel like posting when I don’t really have anything to say, or want to say, so I just.. don’t post as often.
Just saying. I’m aware. Mhmm.
Thing 1: Sunrise
I first woke up very early yesterday morning. I woke up early enough to see the sunrise out of my window. I did not intend to wake up early; I just do.
Which brings me to...
Thing 2: Cats
Since I couldn’t fall back asleep right away, I left my room. Then I saw my cats. They were very energetic at this early hour (5 am). They were hungry and running around. One of them was crying to me to feed him. Uh.. no, boy, I’m not feeding you this early. Stop meowing!
So, uh, that happened.
And of course...
Thing 3: Sleep
What’s it like to get a good night’s rest? I have no idea. I sleep horribly pretty much all the time now. I could go to sleep at night at a decent time, but almost every day, I end up waking up at an absurd morning hour (between 4 and 7 am). There’s no reason for me to wake up that early! Why does my body hate me so?!
I’m just.. so very tired. :(
I don’t know what it’s like to sleep more than 4-5 hours at once. My sleep quality is terrible.
Haha, I’m just being me with that insomnia-but-also-not-really. :’}
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I hate that it’s July. I don’t like it.
Too many bad memories and thoughts. All from July.
I’m feeling kinda sad tonight. And I’m scared.
I feel like I won’t ever truly love living. Life doesn’t seem that desirable.
Maybe I’m the one “addicted” to death since I always find myself thinking about it. It’s a way out. I don’t know.
I don’t know.
Ha, yeah. Waking up briefly to see the sunrise is something that happens to me pretty frequently, too. Like... *waves arms in the air* why are you like this, brain?? *Disappointed sigh* You're better than this...
ReplyDeleteIt's almost comforting to know we have similar bad sleeping-patterns, though.. like, I'm not the only one who suffers with this nonsense. It's nice. :)
It keeps on happening. I wake up early and can see the early morning sunlight filtering through my window. It’s nice to see the sunrise, but I don’t like how I keep on waking up that early when I don’t want to. Not like it’s much of a choice. *sighs*
DeleteYeah, it comforts me when I read your messages, and I find that we relate to what we’re going through. Similar experiences makes me feel less alone (and crazy). ^-^”