omg-

guys. Guys. 

o m g 

omg

holy shit.

It’s....... it’s...................

........ officially been a year since my high school graduation. 

It’s June 19th.

wow

wow dang 

wow. 

That happened today, one year ago. 

.................. meanwhile I spent the majority of today wanting to cry but couldn’t and wanting to die. 

:D !!!!! life is GREAT!!! 

Will Cutepups return? Find out never! 

also, this happened earlier today:

me: logically, i know people would care about me if i die 

my phone: *autocorrects “die” to “die don’t” somehow* 

me: if i die 

my phone: don’t 

........ I then proceeded to read “deck” as “desk” and chat with someone about what I like to call Spirit-Cutepups-Dreams-About-Their-Own-Funeral TM and turned it into my special humor. 

haah haa haaaaaa aaa triple A

and today my neck has been hurting all day

and in the past few days:

- my ears have been hurting 

- used binary language (them zeros and ones tho)

- still haven’t gotten over certain recent youtube videos *cough cough ahem* pride month

......... haha! I wish I could actually get proper help without burdening my parents even more and giving them more reason to hate me and think I’m worthless when I already think I am!!

in conclusion, i am:

- stupid as frick

- dumb as frick

- a freakin’ frick 

- worthless 

- hopeless 

- a burden 

- there’s so many suicidal and intrusive thoughts stored up in this bad boy 

- an infinity number of points dumber than Both of my siblings 

- forgetten

- family members who don’t remember or call me by my name when they should know my goddamn name 

- oh, this doesn’t make sense? fuck off. 

- someone who might like... dare i say out loud in my head as i’m typing this on my phone... need medication/therapy/fucking anything at this point.

- someone who needs to take a blood test and having people figure out wtf is wrong with my blood this time around yeehaw yeet

- is it a vitAMIN DEFICIENCY?!?!?! 

- VitAMIN B, B6, B12

- “your tongue is weird! wtf is wrong with you [Cutepups]” 

- do i have a thyroid condition? is that it!!

- how much cortisol is in my blood or wherever it goes??

- high blood pressure?? am i gonna have a heart attack before i’m 30??

- hell if i know jack shit 

- fucked up. 

ok i’m leaving. 

ok ko 

+) - a very shitty blogger.