wow

Hi guys. Thanks for everything. Gonna go ramble about some stuff from today. Meh...

So, I don't know why, but I usually go to sleep at a later time than most people I know (like midnight on school nights lol), but then I wake up before 6 am for school. And I don't even have to. And when I go to sleep at like 1 or 2 in the morning on the weekends, I wake up at like 8 or 9 in the morning. I once woke up at 1:30 in the afternoon not too long ago. Wow, me, wow. I'm strange, I know. Like, I defy logic. 

Just kidding, I'm lame. XD

So, this is where I tell you depressing things again. So in LAL class today, we had to research depression (specifically teen depression.. but it was still pretty general). It was for practicing using this year's school databases and all that media center stuff. So when my teacher finally let us actually start researching ourselves, I went on several websites about depression and treatment options (it's for this mental illness paper, one of which I chose is depression which is a relevant one for the topic of the paper). So at first, I was explaining how those depression facts (like symptoms and treatment options) connect to that book character which we had to do for the paper. So then, time passes by. Then I decide to research depression even more. And, I don't know what happened, I suddenly felt all my positive energy draining from me. Because I know I actually do some of the things said in the symptoms list. Like, not as an exaggeration or complaint this time when I'm just feeling sad. Like, as a usual thing. And then maybe when I occasionally feel so anxious I feel sick, I learned that feeling as if you have anxiety is one symptom of having depression. It says it like, "Persistent sad, anxious, or "empty" feelings." So yeah, learning about depression even more made me feel depressed. Yay...

So then when I came home, I felt really tired. So I took a nap. And here's where it gets kinda pathetically funny. So when I woke up, it was a quarter to 6 and it was completely dark outside. So when I looked at my clock, I literally jumped out of my bed and panicked. Then I checked my iPad which was on my drawer next to my bed when I was sleeping. And then I was like, "What the heck, why didn't I change into my pajamas?! Wait, why didn't I charge my iPad?! Oh crap, I didn't do all my homework yet! Why didn't my phone alarm go off?! What about that thing I have to go to on Tuesday nights?! *screams*". Then I looked at the time on my iPad again and realized it said PM and not AM. Because, I wake up at the same time in the morning as I did when I woke up from my nap. Wow, aren't I so incredible? Good, Cutepups, go panic for no reason at all. Pfft... XD

Then my headache became even worse than before I took my nap. :c

So then I did go do my required Tuesday evening activity at that place (such vagueness). And then I became a bit happier again (I still felt down and tired, but I didn't feel as sad for no reason to be by then) because I could talk to my friend who actually is like a close friend to me.. though I can only see her once a week due to reasons. Yay, derpy happiness!

But yeah, I do feel sad for no reason sometimes. Even when the school day isn't even that stressful. Wow, how ironic.

Yes, my mood changes in the weirdest of ways on a daily basis. But when I'm in a happier mood, that just covers up my depressing moods. 

Wow, it's already 11:20-something. When did the time fly by? 0.0

Well, I still do feel tired. Like I always do...

Bye guys. <3

~ Cutepups