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No skit today. Sorry.

I don't feel good now. Like at all.

I could make a long and messy rant/vent, but I don't see the point anymore. 

I hate hot weather. Feeling the sun is kinda painful. Umm lol? 

Ow this hurts. ;; 

That feel when everyone in your school is most likely better than you at something. Doesn't even have to be about academics. It can be about social skills. Or, well, basic tasks. 

I feel so incompetent. People that are years younger than me can do things so much better and easier than I can. 

And it sucks. I hate knowing that I'm not good enough. 

When school returns, my mood just plummets. I'm sorry, hehehhh.

The only thing that made me smile and laugh today was my skit. With my characters. And thinking of my story in general. That whole thing makes me happy. Great distraction from despair indeed.

Know what's awful? Bad dreams. I hate them so much. 

They make me even more scared. Kinda paranoid too. 

Sorry, sorry, sorry.

I don't know how longer I can do this.

This. *gestures vaguely* Anything. Continuing. 

I feel guilty knowing that I'm not good at genuinely comforting people. I'm sorry that I keep on hearing that my friends' lives keep on getting bad. I'm sorry, okay.

I hate being alive nowadays too. Okay? I'm sorry that I also want to die but don't have a valid enough reason to. 

I feel so damn self-conscious and nervous inside every day of school so far this year. Especially after day 2. Geez, I really can't stand myself. 

Honestly, I'll be surprised if I'm somehow still here in the next couple months. Here. As in blogging, as in still living.. either one really. 

My purpose is to become a ghost. Ok doc? Ha, haa.

I might make posts about my bad dreams. Might. 

I can't stand myself. I don't know how much longer I can stand myself being the way I am. 

God idk why I'm here. Don't mind me typing out this post of despair. 

I don't feel as much as I used to. But, like, I can still feel things. Weird, huh? 

That horror movie scared them. I wasn't scared at all. Umm.. oh heck? 

I like saying "heck" lol like how it sounds. Ok pfft haha. 

I know there are so many good things in life. Things that I still have. But, ugh, being alive kinda hurts a lot? Oops lol. 

Kinda want to hurt myself sometimes. But I won't, I won't. I'll hurt my characters instead. Ha, haa. 

Lol hey what's up, how you all doing? Everyone I know (irl at least) is better than me and has been disappointed in me. 

Sipping the tea on those facts. Mm slurp. 

For a long time now I've been feeling like I'm actually rotting. Oh heck. Pfft. 

I'm so tired lol. Pain is..... painful. 

Life updates from Cutepups: Life is a struggle, and I can't believe I'm still here and alive. Even though my life is not even close to being absolute crap. Which makes me self-centered and complaining for no reason. Which then makes me hate myself even more. Oh and I also feel very disconnected in my own life and a little bit in my body. So yeah haha, that's me. Mm, gotta slurp that metaphorical tea. :)) :p 

Bye, aaaaahhhhh. : ) 

Bye.