Exploring Sir Gilbert's Den + Other Stuff

Hello. It's Sadurday. Ha, ha.

Why do I feel like everything's my fault, and they always leave me alone all day while they have fun and be happy without me? (lol me ,,)

I had so many dreams last night (I mean this morning). One was another barefoot dream where I was in the car in a store parking lot. Another was about online things. Another was about being in a cabin or museum or something like that. I forgot the rest.

Haha heck. I'm still sad. *finger guns*

*chugs down glass filled with Kombucha drink*

Mm, those B vitamins! *thumbs up*

*coughs because the taste*

. . .

Why am I still tired and sad?

Aw frick.

Am I hated? Probably.

Me: *looking at things (wow, how very specific)*
Me: *sees that something/s has changed*
Me: ...
Me: *thing/s has/have nothing directly to even do with me*
Me: Huh, this has something to do with me.
Me: When did I go wrong?
Me: I'm the worst and people hate me.
Me: *continues to make the worst conclusions*
Me: *reads criticism with anything regarding myself*
Me: ...
Me: They must hate me too.
Me: I must hide things and make my identity somewhat different now.
Me: aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Me: Haha, end me.

Oh, was that a typo? Supposed to be Saturday? Sat? Not Sad? Wow, who knew. I have my first SAT class tomorrow morning.

End me.

But like. I feel like every negative thing someone else does has to do with me. I feel like a lot of people who read my posts really can't stand me. Because of what I say. But then I think that must mean they hate me as a person then. But I hate what I say too. But I don't know how to stop and make up an identity where I'm mysterious (no one knows me that well) and a funny positive-thinking blogger.

Sorry I can't make myself post something funny. I don't smile and laugh when people say jokes. And when everyone else is laughing. Nothing irl makes me that excited about life and is funny to me.

I don't have anything funny to even post about. Or include in a skit. Besides, I don't want to use (most? all?) the characters I used in my skits in the past.

I don't express my emotions irl. So in places, like school, I look pretty emotionless. Rarely talks, doesn't hang out with anyone, and doesn't smile and laugh at supposedly "funny" things where everyone else in the room is smiling and/or laughing.

Some things irl do slightly boost my mood though. My parents came home a few hours ago after being gone all day, and they gave me two more cat T-shirts. The cats on the shirts are adorable. I like shirts with cats on them, haha.

So I'm not as sad and having those bad empty feelings as before that.

Ugh, I know. Ok. I know what you guys are probably thinking but never comment. I know. Ok. I know.

In the past, I was annoying on here by always posting funny (but also cringy) AJ (for the most part) things. And then getting obsessed with excitedly posting about songs I recently fell in love with. Wow, I wouldn't shut up about that shiz.

And now I'm annoying because I never shut up about my self-hatred (oh all the negativity). I know I'm annoying. I've always been annoying on here. I annoy me. I always annoy me. Haha, I should just quit and stop everything. Haha, but no. Sorry I'm going to continue to be an ongoing disappointment.

It's like I'm obsessed with posting sad things. Haha, so depressing. Yeah frick.

Man, it's like I can't ever be chill. Like ok, me, just chill. Stop. Just stop.

*finger guns ironically again*

Blah, blah, blah.. AJ!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I didn't get a diamond in the Daily Spin today.

Here's the majority of the inside of my trashy den. I properly did the clicking for the 6th birthday cake this time. So that's what it looks like. The blue Mira bird holding the 6 candle actually moves. It's pretty cool. I also did the clicking for the 5th birthday cake. So that's what it looks like. Nice.

Now, at long last, onto exploring Sir Gilbert's majestic Diamond Shop den.

Entrance.

Bridge.

Curved staircase.

Red carpet that leads to a stage where a glass painting of Mira is.

More tiger statues guarding the stairs. I think they look cute.

Some nature in the den. A cool green color for the grass. Trees are there too.

On one of the trees.

The top of the den. The top-most balcony? Has a majestic blue flag waving in the made-believe wind. The trees in the distance look pretty.

And that's basically the den. Took pictures of most things in the den (and outside areas). Missed a few minor things though.

Uh.. what else? Well, I'm not sure if I'll have time to type up a post tomorrow. I'm thinking I won't be able to type up posts every day during the school week. For my own sake and health, I'll decide to post only when I have enough time and feel like posting. Which means not definitely all the time. 

Ok? Ok. That's that.

Oh yeah. Guys, I know I sometimes type up a sentence or two in the middle of my posts that seem bitter. Like, I know I do that. I naturally do that. I'm a bad person, sure yeah. I talk short and bitter to people instead of talking "normal" and lengthy. I'm bitter. Ok? Ok. Sorry that's how I am. Such a bad person. Ha, ha. Oops.

Guess that concludes this post.