ugh

Couldn't think of a better post title. Whoops.

My body is aching. All day ache. No break from the pain train.

School just started, and I'm already stressing out so much. These classes. They're gonna be stressful. Especially the advanced ones. And then the other new classes.

And how it's junior year. And, uh, stress. And college preparation stuff. And future plans.

Don't know if I can handle this. I feel sick and stressed already, and it's only been the first day.

I'm pretty much friendless. I have nobody. Ugh, life sucks. Everyone else with their friend groups. Then there's me. Ha, ha. My one friend who actually cares about me enough to message me still ended up not having the same lunch time as me. I swear, we better have the same lunch time tomorrow. Lunch was bad today.

Ugh, ugh, ugh, ugh.

Oh and before all that school stuff. Ok so. It's pretty much confirmed that my dad hates me now.

He's been hating me a lot more recently it seems. Well at least he's happier with talking with my siblings than me. Because, like everyone else, they are more successful and overall better people than me.

Meanwhile I'm probably a worthless piece of garbage. It kinda shocks me how I'm alive and this old. Life is scary, and I'm very scared of everything.

Yay for misery! :)) (: ((:

So I woke up real early this morning after less than 5 hours of sleep. I go to my bathroom. And what do I see? The water in the toilet bowl very high  and water pouring onto the floor.

What a nice pleasant morning. Pfft, hell no.

Since the kitchen is underneath my upstairs bathroom, the water somehow leaked into the kitchen ceiling and the table. Oh and the kitchen light is messed up now. Broken perhaps, I don't even know.

So now we have no kitchen table we can eat at and no light.

Oh and the best part? How my dad decides to yell at me (this is going on at 6 something in the morning) and saying it's entirely my fault. Haha, everything's my fault nowadays. I screw up every freaking thing. Ah yes, of course. Of, freaking, course. Yeah it's totally my fault the toilet broke. And ruined part of the kitchen.

*eye twitches* Life is fantastic, and I totally don't want to not exist for a very long time! :)) Oh but that's wrong.

Half of my iPad charger went missing, and my phone charger is just about broken now.

Life is great! :'))

I'm probably not gonna be allowed to get a new charging wire for a while if things are like this. If my parents know my charger barely works anymore, they're gonna enjoy watching me unable to use my phone. They keep on threatening to take my phone away.

Haha, it's not that my entire life and the reasons I live are on my phone and on internet stuff. Ha, ha.

I literally can not picture myself as a "properly functioning" adult. I think that, they think that, pretty much the world thinks that.

That's so great. :'))

Anyway, onto actual school stuff.

So, since I'm not taking band this year, my first block class was somewhere else. My class, language arts class, ended up being in a journalism classroom. And it's not even really a typical classroom. Yeah, weird. Took me forever to find even though it was out in the obvious.

Then I had my two elective classes back to back. Forensics is in the same classroom where my chemistry class was. Ah, those memories.

Oh and the project I've been typing about? It was for my AP elective. Because, you know, gotta trick the college people that I'm smart and took smart people classes. An AP class. Man, that's gonna be tough. Learning all about that art history. Art is cool; art museums are neat. I visit art museums a lot. I like art, history's pretty alright too. So why not. Whatever. Good credits. Smarts.

Gotta put in some advanced classes while I still can. Even though in reality I'm probably the stupidest person there.

I have no level of self-esteem. Yay! (:

Then the day ends with math class. The terrible sequel to the algebra series, Algebra 2.

It's terrible because I hate math with a burning passion. My brain just does not work well with math. So I'm stupid here too. But clarify it as an algebra class? Oh hell no, I definitely hate math a lot more now.

Geometry wasn't that bad honestly. I remember how I was so stressed at the start of last year because of my teacher. But, honestly, I like geometry way more than algebra.

Oh and this year I have the same teacher who taught me Algebra 1.

Is there any hope left for me? I'm getting more and more hopeless as each day passes. :)) 

Obviously, I have the other half of my classes tomorrow. First day of school- part two.

Oh yeah. In none of my classes today did I end up having to do those awkward introductory games. I guess that's a plus. They're kinda fun when other people say stuff, but that feeling of fun gets ruined when I have to say stuff.

Haha, I ruin everything. And how everything's my fault. Wow! (:

I have no hope left that tomorrow will be way better. Maybe slightly better. But not a whole lot. I gave up on expectations like that a long time ago.

Ok I'm so tired of life and everything.  

Sad Pup out!

(That's me. Cutepups is sad. As well as slowly growing to become dead inside.)

:^D