Jamaalidays!!! and Twinkle's Story talk

Hey look, I'm finally here with a post on the computer. Ah, Animal Jam nostalgia. ☺

Whoa, this emoticon option is so cool. You can draw a smiley face to search for a specific smiley face. That's so cool, wow!

Wow!

Anyway, I went on AJ. My favorite time of the year to go on- the Jamaalidays!

I definitely won't be able to post every day this month, nevertheless for AJ. This time I don't have any pathetic excuses to not go on AJ this Christmas. Because I'll be away on vacation then. Gone for Christmas, Hanukkah, New Year's. ...

Sorry, I'm so excited for winter break. ;v; hhhhngh

That somehow reminded me. I can't believe it's been a whole year. Well, at least on the 4th it will be. I was away on my DC trip this time last year. I can't believe it's been a year already. Whoa. I did so much work there. 

That was like the one time I felt alive during my sophomore year. 

Guess that means that time is passing by. 👍 

I just found out that my hands are cold. Huh. My hands together are warm, but my hands on my arms are cold. I don't understand this because I'm a stupid frick. 👐

lol these handssss 👐

Ok, ok. Onto AJ. 😆

Aw, look at all those festive animals.

Loading screens I got when I was on:

So cute! 

Since this is the first time this month I've been on AJ, the first two gifts are grayed out. But here's the third one.

Hmm, so it does end on the 31st. Oh ok. 

And here are the gifts for today:

I also changed Precious's outfit to be more suitable for the holiday season. ;v;

She's ready for the Jamaalidays, hehe! ^-^'

She also tried on some members-only clothing items:

Picking the best colors for her, as always.

And now for the latest Jamaa Journal:

Yes, daily gifts.

No blue arrows for this picture. The gingerbread house and the Jamaaliday Rescue seasonal Adventure are back.

Masterpieces are for everyone now. Yay!

Nonmembers can view the chat history now, which is great news. There's also this Jamaaliday gift bag thing going on.

The Jamaaliday Jam party and pet reindeer are back.

Reindeer regular animals are coming back to Jamaa soon. There's also a new Sketch Jam video about drawing a pet reindeer. I was browsing YouTube the other day, and saw the Animal Jam channel. I think the Sketch Jam artists's name is Taylor. Not sure about the last name though. I watched this Sketch Jam video over on YouTube. I also saw a video with snowyclaw and artymis on the channel. That video was pretty cool.

Well, that's the Jamaa Journal.

Here's the chat history. It isn't grayed out for nonmembers anymore.

I also spent around an hour working on a drawing in the art studio program. I clicked the "Create Den Item" button first, so I don't have an actual picture of the drawing now. I have the masterpiece item in my den though.

I put it under two art plaques in my den. It's an art corner now.

And that wraps up the AJ part of this post. 

Honestly, going on AJ and posting this is kinda fun. 

I'm skilled at being happy, sad, and mad all at the same time. (ayy lmao)

lmao means laughing my anxiety off 

shh shh no "bad words" here 

just kidding cutepups is a bad influence 

I'll be saying "bad words" below. Just saying. 

I mean it. 

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I suddenly remembered how in December 2014 I made a post where I put in language warnings for saying "heck" and "hell". And now I type those words in probably all my posts. Pfft, I even put in actual swears in my posts this year. Wow, what a change. 

I'm growing old. 

I can't help but feel like Duke is two or three years older from the start of Twinkle's Story. I started the story with him and Twinkle being 14. But looking back at it now, that just feels so weird. Like ok, I started the story when I was 13. Almost 14. So that kinda means I meant for Duke and Twinkle to be a few months older than me, maybe even a year older. So it's been either two or three years since I began the story. Anyway, I keep on thinking of Twinkle and especially Duke growing older at the same rate as me. Which means today in 2016, I keep on thinking of Duke and Twinkle as being 16 or 17 year olds. That would make so much more sense for them to be that age for all the things they did. Haha yeah. That could also be an explanation why their behavior and language keeps on changing. More complex. 

And for Chapter 52, I kept on feeling as if several months passed by since the events of Chapter 51. But that's just in real life time. In the story, the events between the two chapters is just a few days. Probably between two and five days. Maybe a week. I'm not sure. 

I'm not sure if I actually said it yet, but I thought of Duke and Fierdan's birthdays being on December 19th. So that means I'm soon gonna constantly think of Duke being 17 or 18 while Twinkle is 16 or 17. 

Sorry this probably sounds confusing. I just can't think of them being 14. Fourteen year olds are like little kids to me now. That's so young. Fourteen.

And when I was typing up Chapters 52 and 53, it was so hard for me to remember that I use different words for swear words. Or less extreme swear words. For example, I repeatedly make the characters say "gosh darn it" throughout the story. That translates to "god damn it". It always took me a few seconds to remember to switch it to "gosh darn" instead of "god damn".

Same with saying "paw" instead of "hand". 

Oh and I have a more specific example. So in Chapter 53 when Duke notices his mother and Soulless is talking in his head again about his conflict with life and death, he shrieks "Shut the hell up!", right. So anyway, I originally typed for Duke to say "Shut the fuck up!" there. I remembered to change it as I was in the middle of typing a sentence a few paragraphs later. 

I keep on imaging Duke and Fierdan saying "fuck" and "shit". For them to just swear by saying things like "gosh darn it", "piece of poop", and "what the heck" feels so fake to me now. I guess in a way this is showing how I'm growing up from this story. 

Anyway, past chapters involving Duke in general. They're so messed up. What the hell was wrong with me? I swear I was such a naive little frick.

First off, Duke somehow got detention nearly every day in school. Yeah, what the actual hell. If you get a certain number of detentions in a certain amount of time, you won't just get detention. You'll get suspended and then expelled.

Actually, the school in general was just weird. Was it a middle school or high school? What grade were they in? Why were they learning simple history like the beginning of Jamaa at their age? 

And then the whole thing with Admiral. Like one day she just goes up to Duke and kisses him on the lips. Like, I'm sorry, but like. What the fuck. Isn't that technically a form of sexual assault? There was no consent. I'm crying, I was so messed up typing these old chapters.

And then in the Duke flashback chapter. The guys thought it was weird if not all of them were shirtless in the pool. What, what the hell. Man, talk about being transphobic. Them being like "oh no you're not a real boy if you feel uncomfortable taking your shirt off in the pool". Like, what? Some boys swim with shirts on. What the hell was with me in the past? God damn it.

Oh and then with me typing for a long time about Duke self harming right after that. Like, man, I was typing about that for a long time. What the fuck, past me. What. The. Fuck.

Like no. Just no. Why though. 

Same with Twinkle in another chapter. 

I'm screaming and crying about this. That wasn't an okay thing to do. Oh god.

I keep on proving to myself that I should redo the first half of the story. But I'm a lazy frick who won't do that. Oops, my bad.

And then when Duke was even younger, he just walks to his aunt's house by himself. And he's what? Four? And he finds out his aunt and uncle committed suicide. Like, what? Why? 

Jfc this story is a shitstorm. 

Oh that one too. Did Duke even have a home in the beginning of the story? How did he still look good then? Why was he randomly carrying sleeping bags with him? Why and how did he even have alcohol? Why did he mix alcohol with soda? Why would he trick Twinkle into drinking alcohol? My god, Duke, you're such a bad influence.

Oh and again with tricking Twinkle. Tricking her into thinking you're like another guy. Making her think you're not as sexual as other guys. Such lies. Playing the innocent card around Twinkle. My god, Duke. You're not innocent. For one, getting detention all the time should be a hint that he isn't a good person. And Twinkle is in denial and thinks Duke's the best. Newsflash, he isn't a good person. He's bad. He's nothing but bad. Damn it Twinkle, he killed your sister and nearly yourself. Funny how you think Duke isn't into being hardcore romantic and sexual. That time with him and Dawn. Being alone. Damn it, they took their clothes off. And then before that he tricks Twinkle into thinking they did more than make out in Chapter 40. 

God damn it, Duke. You need help.

Haha, I love roasting my past self with this cursed story.

I've been typing this post up for almost three hours. I'm not sure if I'll change the blog theme tonight. 

Sorry about that.

I'm so tired. 

Bye.