2. Ghost Bones

[Not that proud of this one, but here you go. More poetry.]

i call myself ghost 

as a name, as a state of being.

that's the best way to describe 

who i am these days

i am the ghost.

the past me has died.

i can't ever bring that person back,

even if i wanted to. 

i walk around,

i go places,

i pass by people who i once called

my friends,

but we don't say a word to each other. 

i walk by like a ghost 

i swear i'm physically here, 

but their eyes look past me 

as if i was never there. 

i've known for a while now

to tell you the truth.

i'm fading,

i'm fading away to nothing.

i keep on losing parts of myself-

parts of who i was,

parts of who i am,

parts of who i'm supposed to be. 

i must have forgotten the memo. 

i died physically as well as mentally 

that's why they don't see me anymore.

i guess that means 

i must be invisible. 

i must have faded away 

more than i thought. 

i'm nothing more than

a ghost who only wants 

to live again. 

i feel like a ghost, 

but these chamber of bones 

still hold me down 

into inhabiting this human body.

even my bones want to leave 

this pathetic, wasteful body.

bones are aching and it feels like 

what i've been feeling is

so much more than 

just mental pain

that's only in my head.

because the pain has spread 

to not just my head,

but to all over my body. 

but, i digress.

to sum this all up-

i have bones that want to break

and separate from my soul.

these bones are growing bigger 

than my shrinking and fading spirit.

these bones don't define who i am

they're a place my ghost

can call home. 

and there's only a sick ghost residing in these aching bones.