ok uh

Ok, uh, I'm just gonna say my point. 

I know I asked questions last post. And the one before that. 

(???)

But. (...)

I decided I'm not going to be checking on here. 

Yeah. Sorry. 

I made very stupid decisions.

[stupid, stupid, stupid] 

By being on here as much as I have. 

And I made myself stressed over blogging stuff. 

I don't know. I've just been thinking too much about my cursed story plans. 

For a while, my thoughts have been like, "Hey, you know what? I'm not going to survive math this time around. Heck, maybe my entire semester. I had very bad- honestly, disgusting and destructive- thoughts about the story for quite some time. I'm going to make posts about them. Whatever. Now other people can know how bad my story ideas have gone, and they are aware of how bothered I am about them and story events that already happened. Haha, I really am not content with my writing at all." 

Well.. fuck it. Now you know. 

Got my math final today. I fucked up. At least I know I will. 

Maybe I've been posting about the story so much because it gives me energy, and it's something I'm interested in despite all it's shit..? 

I feel that without it.. I'm nothing. 

I'm going to be dead in a few hours anyway, so I decided to just post the story shit I've kept to myself for so long. I know it's all bad; I know I'm bad. 

I'm not going to be on here. I'm so stupid, ugh, I should have quit this blogging shit a long time ago. 

Writing about my story? To feel happiness? Wow, that sure is ironic and stupid. 

Stupid? Yeah. Me. 

I'm sorry. 

That's it. Bye.