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Saturday, December 15, 2018

stupid texting skit

Forgot to post this other skit I wrote a few days ago. Here, have more trash from yours truly (aka me). 

I'm calling it, "stupid texting skit" lmao. 

While the Duke and Fierdan disaster was happening... 

[The dialogue is through text, not speech.] 

------------------------

[The time is 10 at night. Brock grabs his phone and creates a text group chat with Finny, Sparkle, Twinkle, and Dawn. Every line of dialogue here is a text message.]

Brock: Hi
Brock: Finals SUCK 
Finny: You made a group chat just to say that? 
Brock: Gosh, I am sorry. I miss you guys. 
Finny: You're right
Brock: Huh? 
Finny: It's late, I've been studying all day. I could use a break. 
Brock: Oh ok. Cool 
Sparkle: You think you're stressed? I have to work on my final project.
Finny: What's your project on?
Sparkle: It's a fashion project. I go to fashion school. Did I ever tell you that?
Twinkle: Let me think. No. 
Brock: So, Sparkle, you aren't taking any actual classes
Sparkle: I am taking classes! I bet fashion school is a lot harder than whatever classes you're taking! 
Brock: Do you even have exams? 
Sparkle: Yes! I had to take exams throughout the semester, but my final is this huge project!
Dawn: Good luck with it! 
Sparkle: Thank you, Dawn! :D 
Finny: It's only the first semester, and I had to do so many presentations for my business class. I have to dress up for them too which is ridiculous since it's a 9 am class. 
Twinkle: Ah geez, that's awful. 
Finny: ikr 
Sparkle: My goal for my clothes line is to make it lesbian friendly 
Dawn: What 
Dawn: What does that even mean?
Brock: Omg Sparkle you can't just say that
Sparkle: What? 
Twinkle: Pretend I'm giving you the Look. Except I actually am. 
Dawn: The Look?
Twinkle: yes 
Sparkle: No need to be rude
Twinkle: I'm not being rude. There's just no reason to say "lesbian friendly" like wtf do you even mean by that? 
Dawn: Yeah, adding on from what Twinkle said,
Dawn: Are you trying to say you're designing and creating flannels? Rainbow apparel? Gender neutral clothes? Femme? Also what about butch? Or do you, or should you, refer to the entire LGBTQIA community? Or at least those wanting to present and dress feminine? 
Sparkle: I'm trying to be inclusive :/
Dawn: Ok then make sure you are 
Twinkle: Girls, you gotta chill. Fashion is fashion. Does it even matter? I'll just wear whatever the fuck I want. 
Finny: Umm....
Brock: I'm laughing over here 
Finny: ...... k 

[Some time later.]

Brock: Does anyone else think it's weird that we haven't heard anything from Duke or Fierdan in like a month? 
Sparkle: Yeah, we can finally live in peace! 
Twinkle: idk what's going on 
Dawn: It's suspicious 
Sparkle: That's because they were both acting strange in that group chat we were all in. 
Finny: Hmm...
Finny: I tried texting Duke's phone several times, but the texts wouldn't send. 
Brock: Yes! My phone says there's something wrong with the "connection" lol wtf 
Finny: I get that message too!
Twinkle: Ok I'll admit it. So did I. The same thing happened with me. 
Finny: What about Sparkle and Dawn? 
Sparkle: They should've sent me some dumb thing by now
Finny: Fierdan sends you dumb things?
Sparkle: Lol no, I was thinking about Duke
Brock: Fierdan sending Sparkle cryptid memes XD 
Twinkle: ok that is funny 
Finny: Dawn? 
Dawn: Oh right, same as what everyone else said. I'm getting worried about them tbh 
Brock: Same :( 
Finny: Wait a sec
Finny: Does anyone have Fierdan's number? 
Dawn: I do. Got that same "no connection" or "message failed to send" on my phone. 
Finny: Oh 
Twinkle: It's so weird. What is going on with them?

[A shorter time later this time.] 

Finny: wtf is wrong with me lmao 
Dawn: what is it?
Finny: I suddenly remembered that one time 
Finny: Sorry, I'm laughing so much 
Twinkle: Are you ok, Finn?
Finny: Yes I just 
Brock: lol what's so funny 
Finny: ok ok so like 
Sparkle: Just tell us already! 
Finny: Remember that time Duke took a bath at like 3 in the afternoon? and how he. How he made fire come out of the faucet? 
Sparkle: Ugh yeah >:/ he burned the bathroom door 
Brock: oh yeah lmao 
Sparkle: It's not funny! 
Finny: Anyway so like 
Finny: I was mad at Duke so I 
Twinkle: Omg just type what you wanted to say 
Finny: Sorry I type slowly 
Dawn: it's ok, Finny 
Finny: I told Duke "fuck you" a few times 
Finny: and he was like "I only have a towel on ;)" 
Finny: That conversation is hilarious to me now like wtf Duke 
Sparkle: Duke's mind is dirty and cursed, what else is new? 
Twinkle: Nothing is new 
Twinkle: Except that Brock is right. Finals suck!
Brock: Fuck yeah! Got that right! 
Twinkle: uh? yeah 
Finny: And that's not the end of it. I was clearly frustrated at Duke when I was saying "fuck you" to him. But how does he respond? Basically like "ok Ok Finny, my dude, my boy. my friend. You keep on saying 'fuck you' to me, and I'm naked right now. so I get your message. if you get what I mean" idfk then he winks ;) ? "fuck you? then do it" lmao wtf is with this guy 
Sparkle: Are you trying to kill me? 
Finny: No, I just think that time was hilarious. Stupid too.
Sparkle: This whole chat is stupid.
Twinkle: True, true. 

[... idk]

Brock: I agree with Dawn. I'm actually worried about Duke. 
Brock: Don't laugh 
Sparkle: lol 
Brock: ...
Sparkle: oops 
Brock: That time we met over fall break, and then during the group chat on our laptops
Brock: I just
Finny: No, I understand. 
Brock: Duke clearly isn't doing okay. Fall break- he pretended to be high 
Sparkle: Exactly! Who does that? :/
Finny: He only did that because he couldn't stand himself.. not being high? or drunk? tbh idk 
Brock: Isn't that disturbing? Sad? 
Dawn: That he feels more comfortable under the influence of drugs? Hell yeah 
Brock: And then how he enters the group chat late. 
Twinkle: Duke was making all of us uncomfortable. But you're right. I am concerned. 
Brock: He wasn't pretending to be high then. He really was. Right?
Dawn: Yes, Brock. 
Finny: Don't forget how Fierdan was behaving. He was acting strange too 
Twinkle: The Duke-Soulless-Fierdan thing still confuses me. 
Sparkle: for real 
Twinkle: yeah ?
Sparkle: I don't get it either lol
Twinkle: oh ok 
Brock: I don't even want to know what Duke was doing or where he was right before entering our group chat. Being high, wearing lingerie, the chance he was in an adults-only place... I don't want to know what shit he got into 
Twinkle: None of us do. 
Brock: I think by "dance" he didn't really mean that. 
Finny: He wanted to off himself.
Brock: oh right, that too.
Finny: then what are you talking about? 
Brock: I was thinking that he was referring to something.. something uh.. sexual when he said that. And what the hell was he wearing? 
Sparkle: Thanks a lot, Brock. Now stfu 
Finny: That whole thing was wild. 
Finny: But yeah, to me it feels like he's punishing himself now more than ever. People did terrible things to him. Uh..
Dawn: Yeah 
Finny: idk where I was going with this 
Dawn: that's ok 

[... huh]

Sparkle: Can we stop thinking about them? For once? 
Brock: Ok
Finny: Sure 
Sparkle: Ok. We're all stressed college kids, and life is shit for all of us right now. But hey, it's almost winter break. The holidays! New year's! Oh yeah! 
Twinkle: I can't wait for finals to be over. I'm sick of living this dorm life. 
Sparkle: ikr! 
Finny: can't wait, then I can finally relax. but for now, I'm stressed out of my mind D: 
Dawn: You guys know I'm not in college yet? 
Twinkle: Oh shit, that's right! 
Dawn: I sent out all my college apps at the beginning of the month
Sparkle: Good luck :) 
Dawn: haha thanks 
Brock: Is college even worth it though? It's just lectures and a dozen 3+ page essays due in 4 months 
Twinkle: I'm not the only one who had to write that many papers? Thank you, Brock! We're not alone! 
Finny: I don't think I had to write that many essays, but I definitely wrote a lot more these past three or four months than I had to write in high school in the same amount of time. 
Brock: Yeah, college is a lot of work! :( 
Dawn: D': 
Dawn: Good luck! I believe in you! 
Sparkle: Thanks again! 
Twinkle: Thanks :')
Finny: Thanks!
Brock: thank u 

[The End.]

Probably a more "normal" skit than the other ones. 

There you go. Yay. 

gtg bye 

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