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Wednesday, January 3, 2018

New Year 2018 Skit (part 1)

[Date: January 1st. Time: 7:00 pm. Location: The usual skit scene (which would be based around the couch downstairs in the vague house's living room). Whatever happened to a holidays skit? What happened to doing that, Cutepups? I got too lazy and unmotivated to make a skit about that. Sorry pfft. Have this instead.]

Brock: So it's been two years since then.
Twinkle: Since what?
Brock: Our last new year's skit.
Twinkle: *looks at Brock, confused* It's been two years?
Brock: Yeah.
Twinkle: That would be January in the year of 2016.
Brock: Yep.
Twinkle: Okay.

[By the way, all my skit characters are in this skit thing. Supposedly.]

Duke: *wheezes?* Oh my god, that old skit. Yikes!
Finny: *looks at Duke with concern* Are you ok--
Brock: *interrupts Finny because he's so rude* Stop being drunk, drunkie!
Duke: *slams fist into couch cushion?* I'm not drunk, square head!

[Sparkle and Dawn enter the room.]

Sparkle: Why are you guys so immature?
Dawn: *sighs and joins them on the couch, sits next to Twinkle*
Brock: In the last new year's skit, Duke was actually drunk. And he was only 16.
Duke: *sighs* I'm older than you, Brock.
Brock: That's true, but I don't care.
Dawn: Hey Brock, when's your birthday?
Brock: I.. have no idea.
Dawn: You have no idea when your birthday is?
Brock: Nope!
Dawn: *looks at Brock with a weird and deeply concerned expression* Well.. uh.. okay then.

[I'm so tired. Why am I typing this now? Hmm.. Fierdan, Ryen, and I don't know who else enter the room skit scene. Oh mm.]

Duke: We were so naive back then. Remember what I said?
Ardere: *he entered the room with them, I guess* No. I wasn't even in that 2016 skit. Where was I?
Fierdan: Yeah, I wasn't in that skit either. Where was I? *stares at Duke* Were you trying to impersonate me, you fool?
Ryen: Oh and I was called Night back then. Why was I even called that? Night isn't my name. It's not even close to being my name.
Twinkle: *is so cool, so casual* Brock didn't know your name, Ryen, so he decided to call you, Night. Until your name was revealed, that was what we decided to call you.
Brock: Oh hey, Night. What's up?
Ryen: I don't know why I let you call me that.
Fierdan: *is no longer staring at Duke who is sitting obnoxiously on the couch* Yes, I have no idea why Brock decided to refer to you as the same name as my black bird affiliate.
Finny: Your what?
Fierdan: *sighs* My pet.
Duke: Oh, not this "pet" nonsense again.
Ryen: *coughs*
Fierdan: What the f*ck, Duke? No.. what the hell.. no! *shakes head*
Duke: Oh.. wait...
Fierdan: *sighs and takes out a loose thread on his shirt* What is it?
Duke: You think that Brock calling Ryen the word, Night, vaguely refers to our black bird affiliate.. which was kind of like your pet.. that we call Night Crow.
Fierdan: Wow, you figured it out. Finally.
Duke: I'm slow sometimes, okay? You don't have to be so rude about it.
Fierdan: You're a fool for forgetting about Night Crow.
Ryen: In his defense, none of us have seen or talked about the bird in a long time.
Fierdan: Shut up, nerd.
Ryen: *rolls eyes* You're never stable in these skits.
Fierdan: F*ck you! I'm never mentally stable!
Fauna: *sighs, she also entered the room with them* We get it, Fierdan. You're bitter that Duke took up both his and your identity in that old skit. I wasn't in that skit either. *faces Duke* What were you saying before?
Duke: Oh.. uh.. yeah. It was stupid of me to say that I was excited that 2015 was over. Because.. well, y'know.. 2016 ended up being a terrible year. Cutepups tried to erase us all from existence. That's worse than death.
Twinkle: 2016 was an awful year. We didn't know how much that year would suck back on the first day of the year.
Sparkle: 2017 was technically a little better, but that year was also one of the worst ones I remember experiencing.
Dawn: *sighs* Well, don't jinx it for 2018! This year has to be good! It has to, I tell you!
Duke: It better not be another bad year. I'm sick of all this sh*t.
Brock: You're sick of it?
Duke: Yes. Yes, I am.
Twinkle: *sighs* Why do you two keep on doing that?
Brock: Doing what?
Twinkle: Asking Duke.. like that.. when he says a sentence about how he feels.
Brock: Oh, I don't know why.
Twinkle: *sighs* 

[Finny suddenly jumps off the couch.]

Finny: I just realized something!
Duke: What is it, dude?
Finny: Way back then, Cutepups didn't refer to any of us as humans in the skits.
Duke: Oh god, those were dark times, my boy.
Finny: They seriously were.
Duke: Reminds me of the story universe. *shudders*
Dawn: Well, we're all humans in skits now.
Sparkle: Thank god.
Twinkle: Yeah, glad that's over.
Ardere: Oh, so that would mean--
Finny: Yeah, yeah.
Ardere: Huh? Okay.
Fierdan: I'm offended. Why was my brother in skits back then while I wasn't? I'm a more popular character than him.
Duke: Back then, Cutepups saw us as basically the same character. Their thoughts on us as characters has changed a lot since then. And so, we're two distinct characters in skits now.
Fierdan: Hmm...
Duke: Hey, that's the truth!
Fierdan: Okay.

[Cashier Girl No Lady has now arrived. Somehow. Yeah, just go with it. I got this, guys.]

Cashier Girl No Lady: So, umm.. it's the new year. Shouldn't we talk about that? For this year, I mean? It's 2018. We all know the past two years were horrible, but we have to live in the present. The past is in the past.
Brock: Wow, you're so beautiful and smart. I love you, Cashier Girl.
Cashier Girl No Lady: I know you do.
Fierdan: Oh hell no, we aren't ending the skit like that. There's no need to flirt right now.
Cashier Girl No Lady: What are you talking about?
Fierdan: There is no need to put straight romance into this.
Dawn: What are you talking about?
Fierdan: I'm stopping it before it starts.
Dawn: Before what starts?
Fierdan: Oh, you know...
Dawn: No, I don't.
Sparkle: *briefly laughs* There was straight romance at the end of that 2016 skit.
Twinkle: The past.. what a time. Yeet! *gets up off the couch*

.............

*nearly falls asleep on my keyboard*

Bye, ily!

~ Cutepups

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